CHICKENS IN THE HOUZE

2011-02-23T00:23:00.001+08:00

Who ever thought a day gone so wrong could turn out so lovely?

Cash Money

2011-02-21T17:46:00.002+08:00

I dont know when to collect my pay from TCC. I need to confirm with Steve or Fiqah. Umai the girl who works with me already got her pay. TCC owes me $201.30 which i'm gonna use to get my iphone4.

Dad's gotta pay half of it! Meheheh. I'm still thinking if I should get a blackberry or Iphone la. anyways chingay's allowance only coming in 3 months' time. They owed me cabfare! Like 42.60 and i heard its 85 for training cause i didnt turn up once.

Anyways. I'm gonna work for this events thingy on my semestral break. Its gonna pay close to a thousand. And I'm only working 13days. So yeah hopefully everything goes well as planned.

I'm still deciding whether I should go for Justin Bieber's concert. I really really do wanna meet him though :( but apparently everyone i've sought to said spending my money to see him sing is just not worth it.

Sigh. I'll see how la k.
Stay tuned! :)

2011-02-16T10:54:00.001+08:00

HI I FEEL LIKE GOING ACTIVE AGAIN!!

HAHAHA

CAN I ?

2010-04-25T21:06:00.001+08:00

I HAVE TUMBLR NOW.
AND TO THOSE WHO WANNA KNOW WHATS HAPPENING IN MY LIFE,
SINCE MY BLOG HERE IS DEAD,
YOU CAN READ MY PRIVATE BLOG.
REQUESTS FOR BOTH IF INTERESTED.

>:P

2010-04-20T20:27:00.002+08:00

i dont think i'll be updating here anymore.

i think i shall keep my thoughts to myself and to those who are

interested to know them.

i shall update on my private blog.

till here...

:)

2010-04-16T01:32:00.002+08:00

hello world.
today i went singapore poly for freshmen party.
i get to meet atiqa whose currently in sp aerospace.
and lin and ael and shanks and shuhada and khai came also.
im sorry guys if it sucked.
i think it suckedd too. and i think next time must go either with the girls aje. or with khai aje.
cause i feel like its hard to connect with both parties uh.
like divided love like that.
hahahaha.

anyways, it was fun.
shanks got to battle with alif.
it was cool laaaaaa. heheeeeeee.
however, i still think the atmosphere and everything are horrid la.
songs especially laaaaa. like DOUBLE BEE OH ARR AII ENND GEEE!!
and i think i have to restrict myself from doing things that i usually do at clubs.
cause my friends and boyfriend were there what.
if they see how i do it, haiyaaaaa.
paiseh babe.

anyways, school is starting on monday.
honestly, im fucking scared la.
really, im fucking scared for school.
URGH. bye all.

2010-04-14T01:16:00.000+08:00

hey all.
I LOVE YOU BITCHES.
TAG TAG TAG ME KEH <3

2010-04-10T01:21:00.002+08:00

monday
11-12 cp2029 tutorial basic pathology t1473
1pm-2pm cp2063 lecture genetics and molecular biology t1473
3pm-6pm cp2063 practical sem 1 week 2,4,6,8,12 t11a501

tuesday
8-11 io chem prac sem 1 week 2,4,6,12,14 t221a/t221
11-12pm cp2063 tutorial week 2,4,6,8,12,14,16,20 t1474 diff lecturers
11-12pm cp2063 tutorial week 1,3,5,6,11,13,15 t1474
12-1pm cp2063 lecture t1474
5pm-6pm cp2070 tutorial clinical instrumentation and automation t4a51 sem 1 week 20

wednesday
8-10 iochem lecture t1472

thursday
8-10 cp2070 tutorial week 11-16,20
10-1pm cp2070 prac week 12-16
3pm-6pm cp2029 lecture t1473

9-10 iochem lecture t621
10-11 iochem tutorial t621
3-6pm communication skills for health professionals t1472

K. I UPDATE THIS CAUSE ITS VERY HARD TO SEE AT SCH WEBSITE.
BYE.

2010-04-10T00:42:00.001+08:00

heya bitches.
sorry for still keeping this blog dusty.
anyways, ive went to the hospital today.
for xray, consultation and therapy.
and my bone is recovering.
its forming back!
woots.

but i dont understand why its getting more painful.
maybe due to the exercises.
urgh.
anyways, i didnt enjoy my wednesday night over @ z.
but i li ke li ke li ke thursday!
:D

AND AND
I GOT INTO
DBS 2B/21. im sad not in the same class as they all but luckily i didnt have to waste my sem right!
that means, i have all the freaking reasons to pass this sem.
and not just pass, i have to fucking pull my grades up :/
i wonder......
bye all.
ha.

2010-04-02T01:26:00.001+08:00

HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

2010-03-29T12:26:00.000+08:00

when the brother gets higher, you dont realise what you're doing.

*rolls eyes*
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

*walks away*
i need my chocolates. and i need some speaking to God.
bye now.

2010-03-28T23:05:00.000+08:00

hello...
i dont know why im in a bad mood now.
urgh.
dad just transferred my some cash.
and on 31st mom's gonna transfer me more.
Ooooh!!!! me likey!!!!

im scared for the future, i swear im scared.
i guess what happened is really a wake up call for me.
no more games, no more being lazy..
i just need some moral and emotional support.
support me guys, scold me, hit me wack me if i dont study ok!!!!

i wanna kick some ass uh.
can someone offer me theirs?!!!!

I LI KE LI KE LI KE.. HU GE A DE K!

(ee lee kay lee kay lee kay who gay ehh day kay)

HA HA HA HA

2010-03-24T13:16:00.000+08:00

hey asses.
i realised that im not keeping up with my life on this blog of mine.
sorry yeahhh.

all right. lets talk about me.
im having my holidays. school starts on 19th april. so im kinda enjoying my free time.
anyways i fractured my right hand.
the metacarpals. my bad anyway.
i cant bend my fingers right.
i'll be going for my rehab appointment on friday.

anyways, ive got my results. im very happy with my grades.
grades for all the subjects. EXCEPT FOR CHEM.
fuck that subject,i really hate it to the max uh fuckkkkk.
): its putting myself in a position. if i fail again, imma gonna be kicked out!
i'll make sure i'll pass uhh hopefully.
urgh. i really dont know why uh. i studied like fcuk for chemistry, especially chemistry la.
i failed Maths during MST but i managed to get a B for Sem exams!
B is hard okay. for my standard. A is 80 and above. gah~
but i dont know why chemistry sampai hati fail kan I.
DA LA 6 CREDIT UNITS!!!!!!
fuck it!

i really need to let loose.
i need to party really like fuck.
theres always this lil things that will make me stand up tall again,
even though its just for awhile.
it'll make me feel damn good and wanna live life.
if you get whaddda mean.
):

anyways, alot of thing happened while i'm away from this dusty blog.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

alamak to be honest, i'm very lazy to blog.
my hand pain.
will update more when it gets better!

2010-03-24T02:30:00.000+08:00

SMOKE.

why oh why do people need to smoke?
pfft.

2010-03-15T00:45:00.001+08:00

pain is what im feeling.

2010-03-12T00:37:00.001+08:00

It's that kiss, that one you lose yourself in.

You realize that you don't want to kiss anyone else and that you

are in love;

the world around you disappears except you and that person.

2010-03-10T17:08:00.000+08:00

im not going training today.
dad's a lil prepped up last night when he talked to me on the phone.
im lazy to even look at his face to talk.
last night i had some chat with my sis about our family.
our family is termed boring.
not our family but i mean our parents.
they don't understand us the way we want them to.

so whatever la kay.
anyhoots, i wanna go to shop and save later i wanna check the crust to bake pies.
i wanna make apple pie!
so boring laaa at home never do anything!
okay ahhh.
aku is bingit sekarang.
something is really bugging me. k da bye!

2010-03-08T01:12:00.008+08:00

ALL THE MINAHS AND MATS IN THE HOUZE!!!

HAPPY 560TH POST!

actually this is kinda little for being alive for almost 4 years.
but its okay, i'll promise i'll update more regularly!!

as you can see, through this blog you can see my secondary school life,
you can see how i went through the pain of going through O levels,
my first year of doing silat till now; i started 2005,
the moment where Rose died, her pictures are still up,

you can see how i had my times with my ex boyfriends;
buntal, khairul AR,
how i fought with bayah and andiq because of a stupid online tag?
fuck, how fucking immature!!!!!
how i cheated buntal and went out with his friend! xD
but at that point our relationship was already dying.
i know if me and buntal were to talk about this now, we'd be laughing our ass off.

how i went crazy over syidin,
just to know that when he said i love you to me, he was saying the same thing to 7 other girls.
no wonder 8 was his favourite number. hahaha fuckhead.
sometimes i wonder why am i such a pussy to waste my time on him.
but i know i make mistakes la. (:
you can see how i get emotionally disturbed when people tend to leave me.
and its not usual for that to happen, thats why it looked like im over-reacting when it was just unusual to me.

how happy i was when i went party!!!
get loose momma!

and how my friendship with UC went on the rocks with the guys and then going smoothly back again,
how i had the time of my life with them,
enjoyed going out with them, having them as my children,
being called mummy, and fairzul becoming daddy.
what wonderful memories...

how i spent my 5 months of not schooling working as a barista at coffee bean,
having afiq to bring me home after work,
getting to accept the fact that my sister is gay and had my manager as her first girlfriend. Lol.
pecah babe.
and then to learn to reject people nicely but still be very fucking nice to them.
gah~ the irony.

going through year 1 at singapore polytechnic.
and here i am now! :D

going through all these years, ive finally found my true friends.
and ive found friends who only look for you when they're in need,
friends who stabbed you in the back,
be a bitch behind you, talk bad about you,
when you shared everything with them and you want them to keep it a secret,
but it still spreads.
like fuck kan. yeah, i know.
some things are just better left unsaid.
i also managed to get immune to your way of life,
i dont know what kind of person you're turning into and i dont know what you're trying to prove to everybody.
GAH.
i really dont know la joy.
BIKIN GUA PANAS AH DOHHHHHHHHHHH.

anyways, 2006 was a nice year, having the best class ever 2/8 '06. having IG, ok stop right there la. lol.
2007 was nice too, having buntal as my boyfriend, i learnt how to handle boyfriends who talk rudely.
2008 was lovely, having khairul as my boyfriend even though it was awhile, it made me stronger i know it made me the person i am now, 2008 made me realise that the one who's always there for me was mardhiah. love you babe wherever you are right now. 2008 has made me even more stressed because of O's. but managed to pull it through with good grades too!
wished i'd had that kinda discipline now!
2009 was hell of a slack for me. i slacked like fuck. and i got some working experience.
and i started to get my freedom, slowly but i got it :D
2009's a start to behave like an adult cause when you're schooling at a poly, you have to push yourself. and 2009 made me realise that I always have boys around me, i can get them anytime i want but i never get the ones that i want. ;)
so 2010 has a great start. especially at the night of the new year. :D
i had the greatest company ever, and then it went down,
came up with fucked up problems which made me even more stronger, really stronger,
i managed to learn and accept reality, and i accept imperfections.
i learnt that i should not talk too nicely as in "sayang" or "baby" to just anyone.
i know that's my style of speech but not everyone interpret it the way I do.
so i only say to my peoples in the houze yo!!!!! :D

and i love ya'll!

and I LOVE ZULKHAIRIL ZULHANIF PERIOD PERIOD

MENSES PERIOD!

HAHAHAHA.

i guess thats it for now. i'll update more about yearly stuffs when it reachs 2014! hahahaha!
BYE ALL.

2010-03-06T01:21:00.001+08:00

cause everytime we touch, i get this feeling.
and everytime we kiss, i swear i could fly.

AWHHHHHHHH.

NOTE TO BE TAKEN.
BROKE MY 1 YEAR PLUS JINX.

and damnnnnnnnnnn, i feel good.
is that bad?

FUTURE FOE

2010-02-28T20:00:00.002+08:00

honestly, im afraid of the future.
im afraid if i cant get a good job,
if i cant get a good pay,
if i cant give both my parents money every month,
if i cant help my parents feed my younger blood,
in other words give them what they want,
as they already have what they needed.
if i cant have enough to get married,
i wonder if...
i can get my own house,
my own means of transport,
if i can feed my child and give them what they needed,
give them the best,
if i can take good care of my marriage,
if i can take good care of my other half,
set food on the table,
but most importantly im scared if i cant be a good servant of His.

ive been forgetting Him alot these few days.
i only remembered Him in the morning and at night when im at home.
once im outside, i dont have time to attend to Him and show him that i really love Him and that im contented with what He has given me.
people always say as long as you have the intention, its alright.
no its not. action speaks louder than words.
and that is why i always need someone to keep reminding me.
im not perfect and i always make mistakes.
and i understand that sometimes the evil overtook the good.
its up to us to bring em down.

anyways, the reason why im feeling so restless these few days is probably because of my major exams.
and why im worried is because,
no matter how hard i tried to understand chemistry,
i just cant.
and i have a huge feeling that im gonna repeat like 2 modules?
i dunno.. theres just no chemistry between me and sciences.
sometimes i think if i had choosen the right course.. hmmm.
never really think of that one huh before i start school.
that is also cause dad wants me to be in this course.
yeah, i understand that most of the things im doing right now is for my parents.
and the only thing that i love doing is going for silat training.
bonding with the people.
and i still remember how both of them dont really support us with silat.
and they were disappointed when me and sis decided to stop swimming.
how mom screamed at us in the car when we told her we didnt wanna go on.

i sometimes think that we should just follow our instincts not the crowd.
and even though we're good at what we're doing but if we dont love doing it,
why do it?
for fame? for money? so that people will notice us?
i always tell my dad to keep reminding me to study and study.
but sometimes the way they told me only demoralises me and made me feel like telling them,
im not smart like your technician's son!!!!!!

and both of them wants me to concentrate on education first and dont take relationships seriously.
their point is that we dont know who might come up when we're older.
perhaps better people,
and if after meeting alot and we still think that he's the one,
then we shall settle down.

whatever..
living in this era is really hard.
in this global recession world, everything have to do with kaching and more kaching.
urgh!!
anyways, mumsy and dad wants to live overboard once boy finishes his NS.
im not sure if its gonna happen but i wish that we'll live somewhere more peaceful.
where i can stop running for the world and settle things down and get ready for the afterlife.
we need to think of all this right?
and ive made up my mind..
if God permits and if i have enough resources and the right job,
im gonna leave singapore and stay at our neighbours'.
that's if im settled and if my husband agrees to it.
if not, then we shall see how things will work out jyeah!

allright people might be wondering about me and khai.
firstly, I realised that i really love zulkhairil.
ive never met someone who is so serious to be with me.
and i can tell that he really loves me.
he's the only one that i can be myself,
dont have to act nice, dont have to laugh and cover my mouth,
dont have to be someone else,
i just have to be myself.
show him all my bad sides,
fart in front of him,
burp in front of him,
let him see my swine ugly faces,
i just dont have to worry about him thinking im a weirdo.
and he feels the same way about me too.
he dont have to be this perfectionist.
:D
and one of the reasons why im in love with him is because ,
i know he loves me more.
and thats what mom always tells me to.
though we've been through some harsh times,
i believe that we can work our way out.
and i believe in you.
and i promise that i'll commit if you support me in whatever i do.
though we're not attached,
i feel that ive taken you serious enough to tell my parents about you,
told them that i really like you,
bring you home and let them know a lil one or two about you.
so yeah, i guess ive explained enough.

anyways,
THE POINT HERE IS THAT I HAVE TO GET OVER WITH YEAR 1 BIOMEDICAL SCIENCE!!
GRRRRRRR!!!!

3RD MARCH HURRY!
i wanna work during the holidays, maybe become instructor at camps or stock take at spotlight.
any posts to recommend for me? :D
hit me back.

cheers!!!

2010-02-21T22:52:00.000+08:00

HI. AKU MISS ZULKHAIRIL.

period.

2010-02-12T21:30:00.002+08:00

i apologise for making my blog so dusty.
ive been busy trying to please edward and jacob at the same time.
see, they cant get enough of me.
its been hell of a ride this few weeks.
ive been busy with school.
Posters, PBL, and i dont know what else.
And i did Chemistry quiz just now.
I shall not say how much I got. its a disaster.

and did i say?
im broke now.
and its not even half of february.
like really broke laaaa. never like this oneeee.
i think i shud be more careful on my spending.
and ive watched tooth fairy,my ex,santau~
woooots.

i think im spoiled!!!
and and i have a big love bite on my neck.
joking laaa. got this boy kicked it during psk training.
BUKIT GOMBAK NYE BUDAK.
hmmph. kawan die uh.
and and aelfizo made my arm very colourful.
got dark blue, purple, red.
but the most of all.. NUR FAZLIN JUMAEN.
she kicked my pinkie for the i-dont-remember-how-many times siaaaaaa.
then after training, it went so swollen uhhhh.
my friends say at school it looked decomposed.
hahahaha.
but thank god its better now. just that its a lil crooked.

hopefully it will be better soon.
and ive uploaded pictures from the outzx to marina, to the zoo.

AND PEOPLE I'LL BE BACK ON MONDAY.
im going off to pasir gudang tomorrow for the friendly against seni golok.
and then i'll go off straight to batu pahat.
stay there for 2 nights at my grandaunt's.
and i remember, my second cousin already has a baby.
and he's my age la. his boy would be one this year i think.
beautiful boy.

and to all Chinese, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR.
GONG XI FA CAIII HAO PAO NAO LAIII.
HEHEHEHEHE^^

MIDAH, AKU RINDU KAU GILER BABI, BABI PON TAK RINDU KAU MACAM NI.

AND, HAPPY VALENTINES DAY.
i still hate the fact that in my soon to be 18 years of life, i never had a chance to have a nice valentine.
WHY AH?!

all right then.
i wont be blogging much. will do when i have time.
stay tuned.
24th- math
26th- basic microbiology
1st- inorganic & organic chemistry
3rd- Cell biology

HATE THE FACT THAT I HAVE A PAPER ON MY BIRTHDAY.
FOOKS ITS. IS TAKS SUKS!!!!!

bye bye!!

2010-02-04T22:14:00.001+08:00

mua happy pills.
i just realised i always blog only when im sad, angry, bored or anything not close to positive.
but not today k :P

today will be stressly post. got that word not?
i realised that ive been doing either maths or chem revision only these days.
how about basic micro and cell bio?
DEAD.
im scared. dead fucking scared la for the exams.
:((((((
i wanna cry already.
i need a tutor to teach me maths. actually shady can teach me cause he already learn differentiation.
but that ass dont even pay attention to class and he cant teach me already,
he even cheated for his class test!
LOL.
pukat abis.

anyways, thanks to used-to-be-toyol for being my study partner.
and shady yang nak belajar at my crib, we end up watching movies 2 days straight.
wtf. you ah. bad distraction!

anyhoo, i wanna thank lin, ael, shanks, syameen, nini, koko's owner, and especially shady for being there for me.
even though you dont know the real story, you tried helping me.
and i really appreciate that.

thank you shanks for being there all the time even though 90% of you being there was to scold me.
thanks lin for trying to understand walaupun kau tak tau pape, aku tau kau blur.
thanks ael. :P
thanks shady for the company, for calling me late in the morning when i texted you,
thank you for coming down and just crapping with me.
thanks for treating us to free macdonalds. alaaa mat mat riders. dapat free!
I KAN PRINCESS.

for now, lagu ni yang buat aku :DD
MENJENG~

seratus persen cintakuuuuuu,
hei hei hei hanya untukmuuuuuuu,
seratus persen cintakuuuuuuuuuuu,
hei hei hei hanyalah untukmu,

jujur ku akui,
kamu yang paling ok,
cintaku seratus persen!

100%!
I LOVE NUMBER 14.
:D

2010-02-01T21:36:00.000+08:00

i went school for 1 hour and 15 minutes only just now.
and i had to wake up at 6.15 because of it.
FML.

anyways, syafiq sexy looked quite sexy today.
there was this point of time in the lift when he was talking,
he really like look like edward cullen siaaaa. as in robert pattinson.
no joke. as in the height, the posture all that la, the hair abit also.
damn sialzx i feel like dejavu for awhile.
Lol. had a dream that i was going out with edward mah!

And,
i really feel bad la.
please dont do this to me.
you can ask shanky how i really feel right now.
its the same way she feels about meh.
just that, i didnt dislike you like how shanky dislike meh.
its because of what i know that made it so hard.
i wish it didnt have to end like this.

shoo. enough said already or i'll get stressed up.
i need to focus for my sems now!!!!
ARGH. GPA GO HIGHER PLEASE.

2010-01-31T01:54:00.000+08:00

i miss you, miss you so bad,
i wont forget you, oh its so sad.
i hope you can hear me,
i can remember it clearly.

the day you slipped away.

I was wrong when i said I was strong.

AND I JUST REALISED I DIDNT EVEN ______ FOR MORE THAN A YEAR ALREADY!!!!!!

i was jumping up and down.
PROUD OF MYSELF.
GOD, am i Good or what?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'll leave for now.
not much i can say here.
goodbye.

2010-01-27T22:22:00.003+08:00

i wanted to meet shady just now.
at times like this, i need him to bombard me with all his rants that will make me sad,
but somehow it will make me stronger.
But i didnt get to meet him cause he was at town.
=.='

Shady, maybe i didnt get to say this when I could before,
Thank you for being there for me when I really need someone to advice me.
The difference between you and the rest whose there was,
your advices was straightforward and harsh,
but true. while the others were cheering me up and consoling me,
he did the other way round.
Irrits tapi trues.
so, Thank You once againnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn darling.

okeh i is bored.
goodbye.

2010-01-24T21:09:00.000+08:00

thank you for explaining yourself.
and for the chocolates.

and mum keep asking me to ask bring you over.
she wants to meet you.
it made my heart sink,
cause when she saw the letter you gave me,
she kept asking me whats wrong,
and i have no answers to give her.
and she keep asking me to share.

she told me to be patient, even though she dont know whats going on.
and somehow, it made me realise that i should just forget about what happened.

and just when i was enjoying my ice cream,
Ihsan emerged from the crowd with a girl,
and i said " fuck. ihsan's here."
and then he just stared helplessly and smiled at me.
Mum said, that one is a big no no.

Sigh.
anyways,

To all that ive lied about me and spidey, i really am sorry. Its not that I dont want to tell the truth, its just that people will think differently. If you get what I mean. We started off as friends, its just that things got carried away a lil too fast. People judge you from that. I hope you all understand and its not.. my will to tell the truth. Somehow it is a white lie. Im sorry guys.

:(

anyways pete,
i've forgive you.
and i really miss you.
and i dont want to make you wait any longer.
i just dont like to do that cause i know how it feels.
come back to me.

this is for you.
i took it from pernicious' tumblr. so credits to him.

thank you and have a good night.
and a great weekend.

2010-01-24T00:11:00.000+08:00

In love, it is better to know and be disappointed than to not know and always wonder.

2010-01-22T17:30:00.003+08:00

For the meantime, i'll be blogging on my private one.
there's just too much to say,
and i cant say everything here.

ask if you want to read.
if im nice, i'll let you.

2010-01-22T11:08:00.001+08:00

Is it them or is it just me who invites pain?
Someone enlighten me please.
I need laughing gas.
I'm torn.

2010-01-21T19:57:00.004+08:00

i always tell myself not to repeat the same mistake i ever did.
however, some of them weren't achieved.
i always tell myself i never start something to break it.
you came into my mind today.
and yes, i wished that you would have told me the truth.
instead of lying your way,
and there i was believing every single sentence you've said,
but most of all.. i wished that we were real.
at least i know, my feelings for you were real.
i had always wished to bring you home and tell my parents,
this man is the one i honour, the one i respect,
the one i want to spend the rest of my life with.
but you never gave me that chance.

i wish you'd knew me better.

i cheer myself up,
by telling myself,
everything happens for a reason.

:)

i showed mummy your pictures and she went,
"Handsomenye dierrrrrr! "
aawwwhhh!

bye world.

baby, this is for you.

2010-01-19T15:43:00.000+08:00

this little thing called love.
its bugging me.

theres you in my everyday life,
even though you're not around 24/7,
you never slipped off my mind.

ok back off for awhile now and let me tell you my monday!
monday was okay.
class starts at 8am but i reached class at 9. heee!
and love relations was gooood.
we talked about sex, sex and more sex.
and then did practical.
it was okay, we did a major mistake!!!
hahahahaha! and then during IDEAs, we had to do another presentation.
SO MANY PRESENTATIONS LIAO.
and adham macan calling me in class. even though i told him im in class,
he wants me to get out and meet him. Siao.
i asked him to meet yan for training.

and then i met zlinny!
sorry ad aku tak turon. bukan paitao tauuuuu.
:P
i'll come down on wed!

and then we went bedok, ate at simpang bedok.
lin told me alot of stories, and i told her about ihsan. *coughs*
and then.... we went ssf.
met iqbal, shanky and my sayang. Lol.
okay and zulkhairil.
We had lots of fun. i laughed like shit.
KHAI GAYBOY SAKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK.
but i like. i like you la khai. khaiii. khaiii!!!
hahahaha. ok golek.
khai send me home. then we went off our ways!

thanks guys for making my night a great one.

AND TODAY.
I JUST END MY PRESENTATION FOR DNA EXTRACTION AND GEL ELECTROPHORESIS!!
AND I SAID IN CLASS WHEN THE LECTURER WENT OUT AWHILE,

"FCUK, I SUCK SIAAAAA"

lol. and the class laughed like mad.
sorry guys. hehehehehe.
but the lecturer said our content was in depth and good.
Nyeh.
hopefully that helps in our grade.

anyways, we're having microbiology from 4-6 later.
GAH.
aku belom makan dari pagi. lapar sialzxzxzx.
okay bye.
i love you baby!

2010-01-17T01:04:00.001+08:00

hello world.

my day went well even though there were some hiccups along the way.
i was supposed to meet nini at 2pm but then she said she cant make it,
when i was at my door about to leave.
so i didnt wanna stay at home after getting ready and all.
and i remembered aelfizzow and linny asking me out last night.

so i called ael and asked her where she is.
they were at SGH with kila and diniah.
so i made my way to outram.
and then meet ael, lin, kila, diniah, izwan and rizwan.
orang sakit die tak macam orang sakit uh. hahaha.
and then came atul, princess tamtam *ehem ehem LIN!* and pernicious.
and then lepaks for awhile at the kopitiam, gave my well wishes to izwan and we went off.

SERIOUSLY,
if you wanna go out with them, you need to have a PLAN!
lol. first from shisha, to karaoke, to LG.
then finally, we lepak-ed at esplanade with Zulkhairil.
man, khai cannot meet ael seh.
FIGHT LIKE FCUK MAN.
takot aku tengok.

and then had to rush to bishan for training.
and i dont know why khai insists on following me.
wanna meet my sissy uh! Gatal.
training was fun!
heee.
okay im tired already.

anyways, ni die budak yang suke use the word "fuck" when he's angry.
Same mcm aku.
K da bye.

2010-01-14T23:34:00.000+08:00

hello semua.

aku is happy niari k?
senang kate this 14 days of the new year ive been happy.
much.
thanks to new environment, new friends, new boyfriend.. FAKE!

i think the start of the year is already a great start, a great beginning.
and ive learnt alot from school.
cell bio, basic micro, and love relations.

the first lesson of love relations, they showed us a film.
and in that film, there is a man and a woman.
they never said that they were a "thing" as in a couple.
the man loves the woman, really wants to be with her in a relationship,
but couldn't ask her that.
the woman said she'd rather not have a serious relationship as it disrupts the way of living.
but then they had this affair,
hold hands, kiss, sex in the bathtub..
but never called themselves a couple.
the man was flustered and the lady kept quiet.
the man asked her and she said we're nothing.
kiss and sex and sex again is nothing?!
and then they fought,
but in the end they got together again.

after loving that woman for i-dont-know-how-many-god-damn-years,
suddenly she turned up and said,
im already married.

what a total B!tcH!

false hopes and all shits.
it made me think of you.

when you said,
"I really love you, im not giving you hope."
and i said,
"WHAT?! not giving me hope?!"
you;
"Eh salah!!!!! False hopes!!"
me;
"Terperanjat berok aku!!'
you;
"We're gonna be together.. Just be patient and wait."

dont tell me holding hands with me and dot dot dot is not giving hope.
I'll shove anyone's ass with a dilddd if they say that to me.

moving on to lesson two.
i was given a slip of paper and in that paper it says,

"Why do long term relationship couples tend to get bored with each other? Why does that happen and how do we prevent it?"

Memandangkan perhubungan aku dengan sape sape saje je la eh wasn't very long,
its kinda hard for me to answer but i managed to fork out some words.

" To me, couples tend to get bored because they keep doing the same thing over and over again. like everytime they meet they will do bj only, next time bj again, no other style. "
HAHAHA FAKE!!!!!!!!!! okay serious.

Here are some key points from me and doctor love himself, that is, my lecturer;

"Couples are bored cause they dont change, the guys keep wearing the same old thing and the girl keeps having the same hairstyle. They also dont have a different thing to share about. They dont change at all. Another reason is because they stick too much with each other. Even going to the toilet must be together. To prevent this, they should do different stuff and share different hobbies, so they have something to talk about. And couples need to Grow, grow up along as you grow the relationship. keep changing, go someplace different, do something more exciting, so you always surprise your partner. dont be that same grey dull person.
Dont be with your partner 24/7! Let them have their space. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
And when you say you miss your partner, make sure you take the initiative to meet them.
Because you wont know the other line would have grown tired waiting for you".

this really make me think about us. cause ive already said i wanna do it right.
even though we're not officially together, theres this thing at the back of my head that says,
i wanna be with you today tomorrow and dot dot dot!
So far, we've met almost everyday, but i dont know why ive never get tired or bored of you.
We've gone to many places which i cant say where cause haiya.. its hard.
We've watched a movie only once,
walked more than i-dont-know-how-many kilometres,
sat by Singapore river and talk about our lives till night falls,
sat and talk again at the garden near my place,
watched a live football match together for ten minutes
and then leave cause its too noisy and the hot footballers were distracting me and i couldn't give my fullest attention to you.
fetching me from silat, from school, sending me home.

thank you.
even though i know we're going on an express train,
i feel like we should have done this a long time ago,
and i like it.
and im not rushing anything so dont rush.
im not looking for a status or a title that says im in a relationship with this guy that guy whoever.
as long as im with you, im happy.
and someone once told me if you loved someone, doesn't mean you have to own them.
but i know i'll own you someday. i know your heart's already mine.

anyways im writing this post to let everyone know,
im happy now.
dont worry about me.
Ive let go all my past behind.
Im starting fresh.
So are we cool?

im flying.

2010-01-12T23:14:00.002+08:00

I really really think im clumsy today.
First, I forgot my laptop.
Second, I forgot his iPod.
Third, I'm late and i made cyn and sherm wait.
And Fourth, I left my phone at the Library's table.. until the uncle whistle to me and i immediately ran for my phone.

Omg.
if the uncle wasn't nice and left me with my phone there,
i think i would cry all the way home.
Cause my phone is my only sweetheart.
Its the only form of communication when Im not with you.
Chey. kan i told you there's MSN and FB?~
inside joke!

anyways, basic micro was cancelled last minute.
he was happy ttm, i was... well, i expected it.
Lol. anyways i had hokkien mee for the whole of today and im not hungry yet now.
i had buns and waffle hotdog tho.
i dont know whats wrong with my system.
i dont feel hungry at the times when i know i should.
and my weight is reducing.
even though i still have those lumps of tyres.
but trust me, it was worst before i went bawean.

TEEHEE.

anyhoots, i know some people's O level results and some have yet to reply me.
Midah told me Awel got 19. and she got excited about it.
Arisman i dk who the hell got 33. i dont even know this dude but i know this dude knows who i am.
Lol.
Fiqah, ive heard and im sorry to hear about it.
Do well for your retake okay, and dont give up. (:

Khairil told me he got 18. nice dude. for a busy man like you, its a good one.
even though its twice of mine! , dont get disheartened and dont repeat that im smart ever again
or i'll chop your head off you.
I am Not Smart. I repeat, I am Not Smart.
and if you need help, just ask me cause i can direct you to Shanky Morey *hmmphhh*
to tell you more about Nursing. experience of a Withdrawed Nurse Student with no Bio background.
and mind you, i am not jealous of the relationship you guys are putting up in Fb.
*shakes head*
i know what you are up to. Chey.
hahahaha!

oh yea, i need to start revising already for Sem Exam.
gosh. how fast time flies.
but for tomorrow, ive gotta exercise! Silat @SP and then.. at thomson.
dont know whether im going for the thomson one or not.
Haha. tired like hell baby.

And, i need to meet you Asap.
I need your hug already.

Oh God Please!
Im in Love.

2010-01-11T01:58:00.001+08:00

ive just known him for awhile.
and im already throwing everything i have to him.
i think he's like alif.
IRRITATE ME LIKE HELL.
Pffffffffffffft.
on the other hand, i dont know how he come up with my secret lover.

okay now about my favourite boy, Spidey ♥
anyways Spidey, thank you for today. I love you to bits and pieces and I love you so much laaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Damn, its been some time since someone showed me the meaning of love.
I already know what love is.
Its about being there, having fun, understanding one another, LAUGHING alot,
taking things as how we want it to be,
hold me close and never let me go.
Xoxoxoxoxo. Selamat malam cinta! Mmm!

i asked B what he feels about me.
and he said,
you're the most fun loving gal ive ever met. You've given me much to laugh about to be honest. :)

That shows how ignorant people who claimed that they love us, know about us.
Shitheads. Im not cheap you ass.

anyways, good luck for o levels results tomorrow everyone.
except for that monster on top there.
BYE.

faker

2010-01-09T01:55:00.000+08:00

HE'S BETTER THAN YOU.

2010-01-07T23:30:00.004+08:00

FIRST THINGS FIRST,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KHAIRUL FAIZAL AND SAMSUL HADI.
although you guys are away in the woods,
i want you to know turning 21 is the best thing that can happen to a young adult.
you can now enter a sex shop!
im kidding........
so yeah, hope you guys enjoyed yourselves blowing flies and bugs off your body,
cutting off leaves to give a taste for your friends,
and the many presents your friends give you :D

and im sorry khai i didnt get to meet you the last time.
i really was occupied with my time.
insya Allah i'll lend you a listening ear when you really need it.
My apologies again.

and to H,
im sorry.
sorry that i didnt reply your messages,
and all.
its just that i feel that knowing you at this rate was too harsh on me.
and its just that i dont really have friends who are like you.
and im just UNCOMFORTABLE.
sorry. and i hope when you're away on another land, you're gonna be safe.
all i know, thank you for being a friend.
its just that im not too keen to start having this text conversation.
im lying when i say that i dont mind.
i do. im happy with this gap. (:

anyways, school was okay.
i went to the optometry centre and they checked my eye.
with rays and stuff.
cool shite. and they said there's complications with my eye if i keep wearing lenses for long hours.
they want me to reduce the number of hours.
so yeah, ive been experiencing watery eyes since like 5 days ago.
i think the reason is because i didnt wash my lenses properly when i was at bawean.
actually i did wash it everyday, just that theres alot of dust that entered our eyes.
so yeaaa, im better now. my eyesight's good.

and, MATH is a HEARTBREAKER.
i swear i can cry when i listen to her teach.
i dont even understand a shit.
luckily, ive got nice friends who are willing to teach me.
like nasir, jericho.
thanks guys i appreciate it when you guys offered to help or for nasir's case, agreeing to help.
LOVE YOU ALL TTM MAN!

after which, i wanted to meet ayie. cause he said he was coming.
and then, he said he went off already.
he then told me, ipin was there.
GAH. good thing i didnt meet him or else........
history will repeat again.
CEHHH MACAM PAHAM.

then, i had to go for cell biology class. it was freaking fun.
i dont know why. i feel the urge to start studying hard again, to do well.
i wanted to do well like how i did for my o's.
i mean, to me, thats a freaking achievement cause ive never dream of getting As.
so yeah, HELP ME people. push me okay.
im still wondering whether to choose med tech/cardicac tech.
hmmm.

anyways, my sissy is ready for school.
just hope that RP will accept her for sports science.
i mean, when i went to RP's open house, i felt that if it was me,
i would have been more interested to study.
the location's great, just a few hundred metres from my crib.
and the ambience is great for studying. cool air everywhere.

hold on.
*picks up phone*

S: Hello hello hello, bukak sluar nampak telor!
I: huh?! what! say again!
S: hahahahaha! wah orang tu naik bus eh pegi skola. *someone go school take bus!*
I: eh how you know?
S: your facebook la where else!
I: alaa, blah blah blah. belakang tayar i meletup. *my back tire of my bike blowed up*
S: *cant stop laughing*
I: can you please stop laughing?
S: alamak chills la main main aje apo.
I: kay la you go update your blog then go to sleep straight away okay.
S: okay goodnight!
I: goodnight. bye.

I love people who call me up just to say hi.
but i dont like it when too many are calling to say hello.
i wish that i can cut myself into 5 or 6 pieces this days.
be there for people. mard wanna meet me but she's working wed-fri.
and im meeting my girls tomorrow night. looking forward =)
and DID I SAY SP'S OPEN HOUSE WAS WICKED?!!!!!
there were SO many freaking human body only at the spcc area.
i was like, if i dropped a bomb here, thousands will die.
and did i tell you people also, i love the open house times.
the campus will be full of hot guys and girls.
but jericho said, its sad that most of the hot people wont end up in SP.
hahahaha! they are too smart to study at our school.

anyhoo, im going to start my religious classes sunday.
and finally after telling mom to switch our places of madrasah, she finally changed.
i hated that old place, no discipline, no nothing. i feel that we dont learn a single thing.
we can even sleep in class and those teachers don care.
thats why i can get top 3! HAHAHA.
im going for andalus lessons. yeah, i wanted that long ago cause i really wanna learn more about islam la.
and i wanna learn how to speak simple arabic.
who knows, i might marry a handsome white pious arab man.
HAHAAA.

and i dont think i will be following saturday,
i dont wish to see face(s) that i dont wish to remember.
i might as well go out with my friends or meet midah!
I NEED TO MEET YOU ASAP.
so many things i wanna tell you sayang!!!!
meet up soon!!!

anyways, im not surprised if one day,
imma leave this country and settle down with eddy at the islands.

IM KIDDING.
but i think somehow, if my parents turn mad or something,
they will leave this country and when they do that,
i'm going off too. for awhile only! kekeke.

BYE WORLD :D

2010-01-07T02:56:00.002+08:00

its been hell of a week!
and im so fucking tired with school.
its been 3 days that i start at 8, have to wake up at 6.
but first day i wake up at 6.30.. second day was blardy late. i woke up at 7.
that one late for 30mins!
third day just now i woke up at 6.45.
damn. im like late this days. and slots are like from 8-6.
fuck.

better days are coming tho.
next week on tuesday only have to come school from 4-5pm!
nyeh nyeh.
anyways, for O level students, please come down to Singapore Polytechnic
as it is the best poly in singapore. haa fake!
and to smart fakers who can get 9 points in your 5 subjects please come and join my course okay!
more malays please. sad right being the only malay girl in the class?
but somehow it improves my english language. in a sense.

im waiting for the day to go sp silat.
ive been skipping lately. not feeling rather good.
hahahaha!
as if.
and looking at the schedule of activities that Anacondas are hanging up,
im thinking that im gonna celebrate valentine's day at JB.
im not sure whether we're going JB on the 13/14 of feb.
and then on march, we're going Gunung Ledang. cool ke what!

im comfortable with a person that has almost the same personality as me.
im easy with people who laugh, joke, smile alot.
i get kinda tight with the ones who smirk and give faces as if i owe them a million dollars.
he's different, im out of words.
still looking out for.......

anyways, you get the picture already.
thats the reason why im afraid of relationships now.
they kill.
especially when you leave someone hanging.
that.. only a man can go through with ease.
me? i know just how it feels.

BYE WORLD.

aku tak tercakap ape yang aku betol betol nak cakap ni.
babi. susah sial.
k da bye.

2010-01-04T00:34:00.003+08:00

and that is my busy friend.
the only time we can talk to each other is like this.
i miss you dinny.
(:

2010-01-02T15:47:00.002+08:00

i cant believe i heard what i heard.

i dont even know you.

who are you anyway?!!!!!

im not coming back and get hurt for the 3rd time.
im sorry, theres no future.
and dont you realise, its always you who leaves?
and then you say you dont want us to lose contact?
BAH.

im not gonna be the pants in any relationships anymore.
IM GONNA DO IT RIGHT FROM NOW ON!
good bye edward. i hope you will find happiness.
somewhere.

2010-01-01T05:23:00.002+08:00

reassure me.
do you still need time to think?
dont leave me like this.

How could you even give up without trying?

2009-12-31T01:14:00.001+08:00

this is gonna be a long one.

happy 77th birthday nenek.
i am grateful to have you in my life.
you're the one who took care of me since i was little.
and id been your favourite.
you fed me, changed me, pampered me sometimes even more than my parents do.
it lasted only for awhile but im glad it happened.
i used to say that i love you, more than i love my parents and more than i love myself.
but somehow after growing up, this thought seemed to change.
we lived under one roof in feb 2008.
it changed my whole environment totally.
also due to the fact that i had no space to study, and having my O's that year.
from being 6+1 maid in the house,
theres 13 people in the house, the change somehow was frustrating.
and as day passed, i didnt manage to grew out of it.
i dont mind having you and granddad but the addition of the 3 musketeers and their dad,
somehow, gave me zero privacy and the events that took placed in our home,
the lost money, the stealing, the manage-to-capture-the-devil,
and the worst part was that, you told us to hush about the event and not tell our parents who did it,
and that only made the boy keep repeating his mistakes.

i know i have failed to respect you some time late this year.
due to the fact that i grumbled alot when you really are choosing love,
giving attention and love more to the 3 musketeers,
pampered them, shower them with lots of love,
that made me sometimes think, who am i to you now?
the love that you gave to them were not equal to the one that you gave to my younger blood.
sometimes i pity them alot when you pushed them aside,
not realising that both of them were looking at you.
i cried at times when i think of it.
you're not just doing it to your grandchildren but also to your children.
everyday i hoped and prayed that you'd changed.
but sometimes i felt that it was useless, your old habit couldn't be wiped off.

now, i dont mind at all nenek cause i know, you've moved with them.
and now, you're seeing and feeling and experiencing the hardships of not being/staying with us,
and i dont have much to say as its your choice.
about granddad, i dont know what to say. until today, deep down inside of me, i kept this cold hatred towards him,
for trying to break my life apart, to ruin my parents' marriage, and for all the vulgarities he threw to my family,
and for saying to my mum to take care of her children so they wont become bitches when they grow up when we were only infants,
i dont knoww, i just have this hatred towards you i cant shred off.
but alassss, its okay. i know im nothing to you.
ANYWAYS HAPPY BIRTHDAY NENEK I HOPE YOU WILL BE BLESSED WITH BETTER HEALTH AND LOTS OF LOVE FROM YOUR BELOVED SONS AND GRANDSONS!

2009 has been a hell of a year for me.
it was also one of the good years that ive had.
lets start with the bad ones,
ive realised that this year, ive been hurt a couple of times,
ive been left hanging in the air about 3 times perhaps, which is a first.
and ive been a crybaby, not being able to take control and chill.
i take things too hard, i dont have control of my own petty self.
i always need someone to help me, advice me,
but i know, the world is round, what goes around comes around.
ive done mistakes myself. and hurt a couple of people.
life is fair. to all whom ive hurt, forgive me.
to all whom have hurt me, you guys suck. but still, i forgive you.

i want to be stronger for this coming year, i dont want to depend on others to stand,
i want to be able to control myself and my feelings,
and i know i cant get everything that i want, i know im like a princess like faris said, im pampered and all, but i cant get all that i want.
i have to learnt to accept that fact.

anyways, 2009 has been a great year as this is the year that i made the most number of friends,
from School, SPSilat, Rockclimbing, Psk, IG, TSC parties, thru friends.

One of the most interesting friends that ive made this year is Farhan Roy Rani.
i miss him alot lately.
that busy man. busy with work, silat, school. sigh.
i hope that one day we'll talk like how we used to talk aight an menteng!
i really miss you! nyeh.

Another one is Alif Fizwan.
one of my best webcam buddy. he always get me mad at every thing he says.
he always want to advice me to be alim and all that.
but then he himself jalan pon tak betol. yeah.
i treasure the times of fighting with him, merajok with him until he beg me to forgive him.
HAHA. alif, i miss you.

A friend that ive made this year that clicked so well that i wished we'd met earlier.
Fazlin, thank you for being there for me when I need you the most,
when i had no one to talk to, i threw it up on you,
thank you for trying to make me feel better,
and thank you for offering yourself for me to punch when i felt like doing so.
tapi i tak punch ah k! :P
and because of you, i made friends with alot of other people like Aelfira, Atul, Pernicious, Hamka, dan banyak lagi lah. EH ABG HADI PON! HAHA.

Another friend of mine that raised me up when im falling, Shady, for telling me to stop crying cause i wont get the person even if i cry till it floods.
i was irritated at that point of time but now i know he's damn right.
thank you for coming back into my life, CHEY macam you pernah in my life gitu.
zaman sec one ah kite msg msg? lol.
what i meant was that, thanks for appearing and BECOMING MY FRIEND AH EH!
you've been a great great company minus the smoke and shots.

Another soul that have touched my heart for many years, haaa mp!
Siti Hamidah Md Shafari. i know you hate your dad and his name but it sounds nice la baby. one time only!
thank you for being my friend. you were there when i needed you.
you've been a true friend all this while. even though we used to fight last time because of the butches,
we know our friendship are stronger and we wont lose it to some useless morons right?
midah, i love you alot and i regard you like my own sister.
i would love this friendship to go on years down the road. and if i get married, i want you to be my bridesmaid. HAHA.
but you have to lose weight first and look hot okay, and get married to harris. (;

Another soul that took my breath away,
I dont know whats wrong with me. I cant get you off my mind but somehow i know theres something or someone thats separating the both of us.
and made us hard to do.
ive heard, but i dont want to believe what my head wants me to.
i just hope that one day i will be reassured of your feelings towards me,
cause the worst feeling i can ever have is not to know how you really feel about me.
and that made me mad. it made me so mad that i scream hysterically thinking about it.

anyhoo, enough of talking about them.
i pledged to be a better person this coming year. in terms of emotions-related stuffs.
especially when im gonna be an adult now!
i cant be going around acting like i need a psychiatrist with me.
to be a better servant of His, to pray regularly.
to be able to perform my prayers,
i know ive been wild at times. going to parties and all.
and i know i cant promise not to go again, especially when im turning 18 soon.
but i know, ive done nothing beyond the line.
ive got that under my control.
and to some people,im a virgin to alcohol. not like you assumed!

i want to spend more time with family when i can,
i know im gonna be veryyyy busy on the other half of the year.
i want to tutup my aurat already ah. i want to wear tootsies.
HEHEHE.
can you imagine me going to school with tootsies?
NYEHNYEH.
okay honestly, im not ready for that yet.
but anyways, i wont forget that im still a muslim.

i think that ive said enough.
and everything has been told.
im just looking forward to a better year.
and i need a date tomorrow. anyone?
Happy New Year everybody.

2009-12-30T00:54:00.000+08:00

i just realised that i had no one.

anyways, life is fair.

i have to change my mind and keep this new perspective.

my holidays was well spent.

i hated the fact that the best parts of living in bawean was only during the last few days,

im glad im best friends with the cutest guy in the village and the noisiest girl in town.

im glad i know how to ride a bike,

how to ride a horse,

im glad i get to set my eyes on beautiful landscapes,

im glad i managed to get to the top of mount bromo,

when i managed to get to the mountains, theres the only place i really felt like i was Isabella Swan.

and i wished edward was there with me, or maybe jacob.

honestly, the setting really made me felt twilight-ish.

im glad i knew my cousins whom ive never met before,

met my aunts and uncles that ive never met before,

known alot of the people at bawean,

it really was great.

MINUS THE FACT THAT THERES NO ELECTRICITY 80% OF THE DAY!

one thing that i hated to do, was leaving all that behind.

i wished i'd spent more time there.

it really made me appreciate what i have now.

the simple life however, was fun.

but like i said, its too simple for me that i get bored very easily.

anyhoo, uc and anacondas going changi on 31st dec. countdown keper?

im like.. thinking of another plan.

theres a saying "celebrate countdown with the people whom you love best."

so i'll like search for people i love la k.

but maybe i'll consider changi. nyeh.

k im tired. i'll update more. and i'll upload pictures soon too.

k aku really need a hug. byee all.

2009-12-22T15:32:00.002+08:00

this will probably be my last post here.

tomorrow mum dad and sis arriving to this little island.

they're at surabaya now.

and the next day we're leaving.

mum said most probably we'll be going to yogyakarta ke jogjakarta ke apela name die.

and.. i'll be back just in time for new year.

so orang yang kate nk tengok fireworks with me,

i think i can make it. no promises though.

even though living here is a real boredom,

i feel that ive picked up some values that i wont forget.

and i know, i will miss this place.

and i know, i will miss eddy.

and zet,ria,ida,kak ida,kak wati and many more.

life is too simple here. i need a complicated life or i'll get bored.

k i need someone to hug now. byee asses.

missssss kau macam kemarau rindukan hujan.

2009-12-21T15:43:00.003+08:00

im extremely truly madly deeply confused.

you're all i need right now.

i just want someone to hold me tonight.

hold me close, hold me tight

and dont let go.

will you?

2009-12-19T13:43:00.002+08:00

Hello dear friends.
4 more days and mum and dad and sissy are coming.
then 5 more days and im leavin this island.
ive not been eating right.
actually i ate only maggi yesterday for the whole day.
sad siaaaaaa.

i want to go home.
training has been fun.
-______-
when i heard what he's present to us,
im quite sexcited.
gerek dohh. aku nak blaja terbang leh?
anyhoo, what i learn here cant be applied to weekly trainings.
totally different.
susah siaoz.

k laaaa.
im bored. eddy said i was pretty.
and he's working as a teacher la seh.
he teach P.E and Geography.
power ke what. lagi nak jadi best friend aku.
hahahahahahahahahahaha.
k enough said. byeee all.

2009-12-18T14:14:00.005+08:00

this is worst than camp,
at least camp we have fun.
here, theres no fucking electricity during day.
at night, there is, but sometimes it will be cut off.
i always wake up feeling very angry, and hot..
cause the fan is not working for fuck's sake!

anyhoo, i is very the sick.
last two days, i was ok, but when night came,
i fell sick. i checked my temperature, it was 39.0
i felt soooo sad. cause i asked sis to help take water for me.
and she like angry like that.
my whole body hurts i wanted my daddy so badly.
the next day, i stayed at home all the way.
i felt so sick. and helpless. i wish ibu's here! :(

its okay, 5 more days and im out of this island.
fuck, mum and dad wanted us to appreciate what we have,
and i think two days in this island is already enough to give all the pampered kids back home a lesson they wont forget.
i want to eat macdonalds. im craving for filet o fishh!!!!! AND FRENCHIES.

andddd, goodluck to everyone who's taking ur N results today.
all the besties.
and the connection here is fucking crapped.
i keep cursing here.
dammit.
faceboook can on. but i cant comment or anything.
shitzxzxzx this computer.

I MISS HOME. FUCK.
I MISS YOU. YOU MISS ME NOT?

kay gue nak balik ni.
bye suckassssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.
im dye-ing my hair red tonight!

Yours truly,
the cheeky chickzxzxzxzx.

2009-12-15T12:15:00.003+08:00

hello dear friends.

its my 1st full day at bawean.

for those who do not know where the hell the island is,

let me tell you abit facts about it.

Bawean is an island of Indonesia located approximately 150 km north of Surabaya in the Java Sea, it is administered by Gresik Regency of East Java province. It is approximately 15 km in diameter and is circumnavigated by a single narrow road. Bawean is dominated by an extinct volcano at its center that rises over 650 m above sea level. The island's population is around 65,000. Approximately 40,000 live in the capital of Sangkapura and the rest live in small villages scattered around the island.

the island is around the size of singapore. the little red dot!

credits to wiki.

heeeheee.

oh yea, im living in the small villages around the island. and there's no macdonalds, no KFC.

so sad. at surabaya, theres a&w! i wanna go there before we leave.

anyhoots, my flight was okay. i was alone and the plane was half full.

reached surabaya, then the weather beri hot!

met my twin, twin say from far i look like hot chic, then go near she say i look ugly.

KAMPRET.

anyways, my sissy cut her hair. her hair is very the wawa-ish. denggg.

and then we made our way to the hotel.

we stay hotel dok. 2 orang aje. and then the hotel got indon soccer players stay.

then got alam shah but i never get to see him ):

and then the next day we took the 3 hour boat ride to bawean. we are at the freaking open sea mannn. im scared to the max. i slept for 2 hour and 45 mins!

hahahaha. and then reached, me and sis hitched a ride with an uncle. motor 3 people!

hehehehe!

reached, ate, yadayada.

Then went to my grandmother's side with shanky.

shanky ride motor damn siao laaa. damn fast.

and then my uncle gave me a bike. so me and shank use different one.

I CAN OFFICIALLY RIDE A BIKE AHHHH.

WOOOOOOOOT.

but no license ah!

we made our way back to the court. and theres alot of guys and girls playing volleyball.

and they're damn good la.

sadly. theres only ONE, i repeat ONE hot guy here.

but when he speaks, i get turned off for a while. Lol.

but he's better looking than some singaporeans laaaa.

His name is eddy.

tau tau je husband aku edward. nak dekat dekat ah tu.

but then eddy is the boyfriend of my second cousin.

i think im like related to 1/4 of the people on the island.

everywhere got relatives one.

and the food here iss NYUM.

mee bakso die fuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, bikin gueh kangen lagi!

today woke up at 8am.

then immediately went to that tok's house and did what we had to do.

gueh cepat pandei sihhhh.

ive got some friends already here. and trust me, they're all very welcoming.

even the ibuk at my place dont allow me to wash my clothes.

but i insist that i wash my undies myself.

siakkk ahh member nk cucikan, malu oi! tak suspect betol.

i miss mida alot. i miss baby alot.

ever since ive been overseas, wanna know what i have been dreaming?????

Finding a private place to masterbate.

cause everywhere i go, theres always people who comes in and out.

i dont know why ive been dreaming of that only. its been 2 times!!!

Fcukkkk. and i dont like it!

no good for the babies.

anyhoots enough for today.

i'll blog again some other time. buaizx.

2009-12-12T21:41:00.002+08:00

baby, its been some time that ive dream of you in my sleep.
and last night you were in it.
and trust me, it wasnt good.
in that dream, you told me to leave.
in front of your friend..
and all i did was cry and i was very upset with you.

i dont know why i cried so much i was actually crying in my sleep,
crying for real.
i woke up with tears flowing down my cheeks
and i was sobbing hard.

baby i tried to avoid thinking of it the whole day but its so real that it bugs my mind
and i cant think of anything different throughout the day.
i wish that it wouldn't happen.
its not up to me to write our daily lives.
im just hoping.
and like i said before, i will never stop hoping.

:)
im leaving for bawean tomorrow.
meeting my sissy in less than 12 hours, miss her much.
Goodbye.

EndLess Love

2009-12-12T00:52:00.006+08:00

hi baby you are looking FUCKING MELTS SWEEET here!

can you smile more for me baby cause it keeps me alive.

This dedication is brought to you live from louisiana Vegas!!!
I went sentosa with my peeps just now.
and the zoukout preparations were ongoing.
and they blasted the music,
i went fcuk, why the hell am i not eighteen yet!

anyways, i took the bus home which is a wrong choice it took more than 1 hour
and my pantat yang lembut boleh jadi keras siaooo.
keras giler sexz!
WOOOT!
anyways, the outing was a nice one and i love 1B01 to bits and pieces.

and its 12/12. Happy 13th Birthday Brother.
& you're not a kid anymore so takya perangai macam sua* k lain kali.
mum, dad, my sissy and myself went into his room and sang a song for him.
Mum: Repp, meera da wish belom?
Bro: ngantok ah nak tidor...
M: Huh?! Aper? Stim???

siakk ahhhhhhhh. menjadi jadi ah die hari hari ni. dapat kot.
hahahahahahahaha!

anyways, tomorrow(13th) im flying off already. sissy fetching me at airport.
so i wanna say Goodbye now since i wont have time to update or anything in the morning later, i think.
so yeah, im gonna be back on 28th and then gonna vroom off to KL again i guess.
geeez, i thought 3 weeks of term break and i cant go anywhere!
im pretty excited even though sissy said it gets dull after some time,
cause her type of person dont appreciate the beauty of MAN-kind.
Lol. she should widen her perspectives you know.
And with what we're planning to do there, i dont think she will get bored again.
Cause there's me already mahh~

I'll update when I get there.
When i get to the cybercafe okay.

meanwhile, no talking on my blog okay.
if you have anything to say to me or tell me,
go to my facebook and comment!

To all my homies right here, dont miss me too much.
And Faris Haziq, dont worry too much la, with my absence you'll appreciate me more when i get back,
and i will miss hearing you singing lullaby to me before i sleep at night.
To Midah, Please go shopping baby and do be so frickle minded eh.
Sumpah shopping ngan kau sungguh memenatkan kakiku.
I love you,
To Fazlin, dont miss me too much. Take care of my princess.
To Ael, enjoy your holiday!
To Atul, dont miss chikin too much.
To all the asses whom i forgot to put in here your names,
I love you all to bits and bitters la okey.
To the one who shall not be named, all the best. I love you.

dont mind me asking im just trying my luck here.
anyone has an ipod adapter where u plug ur ipod wire and charge in into the socket?
i need the adapter while im away. to charge my ipod cause im not bringing my laptop.
You can charge me if you want to.
Im leaving on the 13th 7.50am flight.
Let me know.
;)

this love has taken its toll on me.
♥

Goodnight All.

I will never hurt you. It is my duty to protect you.

2009-12-11T00:12:00.003+08:00

these violent delights have violent ends.
i have to admit. im crazy over this pale white hot cold blooded vamp!

adorable isnt he?
i love him most when he's laughing siaaaao.

*looks below*
fierce ah my baby!

Bella with Edward?

Or Bella with Jacob?
Anything the result is, I still dont like the fact that she is spoiled for Extreme pleasurable choices.

Grrrrr. i become werewolf later.
Asal la kau ni cute sangat. Bikin hidup aku susah laaaaa.
Da la aku makan tak kenyang, tidor tak lena, mandi tak basah. Ceh!
Hello there jacob. im sorry that bella didnt choose you. but instead she chosed edward.
im sorry for your loss. dont be sad okay.
i'll be glad to take that place.
^^^
i love it when bella was shivering and you said, its a 108 degrees over here.
And she hugged you.
KAU HOT AHHH JACOB!!
aaaaaaaaaahhhhhh.

Badan die bikin gua panassssssss.
Can I please taste you Edward?!
I'd die to go out for a date with you!!
eh wait, jacob also not bad.
for those who havent watched new moon, please go.
Eclipse, EDWARD IS MARRYING BELLA. woooots!
Edward, i love the painful look you gave when you kiss.
I want one can!

I was hyperventilating throughout the movie.

2009-12-09T21:09:00.001+08:00

~~CHRISTMAS~~ WISHLIST.

Red Laptop cover from Crumpler
Laptop Skinsssss
Black Leather Jacket
Boots
Korean Curls Kawaii Nehhhh
Colour My Hair
Another 822343496433548764538475621 piercings
Sundresses
Printed Tees
More Jeans
iPod Charger Konnect to the Plug
Shoes&Heels
iPod Touch Grrr.
EPS Outing
A trip to Nepal
Another Day With You.

bye.

2009-12-07T11:19:00.003+08:00

2nd paper.
pray that i'll do fine. fine = pass.
i went to the airport early in the morning to accompany linny send the silat team off for SEA games.
princess gue datang. hahahaha.
hamka and ahmad damn funny siaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
remind me of ayie.
good luck team singapore!
and i saw safuwan dalam teevee.
ok deh bye all.

theres a thousand different questions running thru my mind.

2009-12-06T01:40:00.002+08:00

everybody keep saying i look like qilla already.
now my twin is princess taquila okay, not shanky bogey anymore!
alright suckas bye byezx.
i love you edward.
♥

2009-12-05T12:44:00.002+08:00

and im so sick with all of you.
if what i say here is only part of her story, so be it.
remember during the first few months that ive been close with afiq,
and then you guys said that i leave p plate and fai.
i only want fun and all that shit?

yeah, and then you guys sing all that fucking songs u guys put up on youtube,
all about my bad side,
dont you think you should listen to my other side of the story?
MY SIDE.
i didnt say anything what when you guys posted the video.
its just a song, even though it was meant for me, i just make myself blind and deaf.
cause you all are so fucking immature,
to get my side of the story, and PUT MY NAME IN THAT SONG.
and in another video, i saw THE GUY sing and say bad stuff about me.
do i even care ?

No. cause you asses are not worth the heartbreak.
get in inside your head, both of you are over.
kalau kau pikir benar, let it go.
its over what?

and dont like to meddle with other people's business.
i dont meddle with yours.
and fuck those videos.
they ain't real.
My side of the story was not told.
and dear friends, seriously, im not getting worked up here.
i have no time for these people to be all emo and prepped up.
Get a life, and i suggest, Get a new girlfriend.
maybe someone who's very cute?

bleargh.

immature ingrates.

2009-12-01T23:33:00.006+08:00

Dont Say Good Bye - Ten2Five

you stood in the rain,
packed up and ready to go...
my tears are falling again
its because of you.

will you call me when you get there?
will you miss me everyday?
i'll be waiting here at home,
till you knock on my door again

Baby please don't say goodbye
I love you too much just to let you fly
I need you to be my only one
Even if you're a thousand mile away from here

Away from here.

click to listen to the full song.

2009-11-30T21:58:00.008+08:00

this is ayulia. i kinda like her voice. in the grow old with you song.
shank knows her but they're not really friends la just haf mutual friends.
and i think yulia's friends, soffi and fad, they look alike!
nyeh.

ni kekek.

cute kan diorang. Lol.

2009-11-29T13:50:00.002+08:00

my twin, bro and dad flew off at 7.55 this morning.
i was kinda touched when bro said iloveyou in his text that he sent to me.
awww so sweet.
dang, i didnt knew it has him.
cause he changed his number.
-____-"

and to all shanky's friends, she said that if anything happens to her, *touchwood*,
she loves you all v much.
and anyways, my bro got himself a girlfriend last two weeks.
and eversince, mum and dad kept teasing him about her.
cause my sissy said "muke die pecah".
*laughing fits*
but then okay la. for a starter.
bro keep disappearing every now and then. must've been meeting her laa!

she was acceptable.
but i cannot take it when she talks on the phone.
mintak kene sepak punye step cute siakkkkkkk.
Bro: you tengah buat ape?
Girl: i tengah jage adek larrrrrr. *with that voice*

in that act cute voicee. and the way she giggle,
MAKKKKK. MINTAK AKU NYE SIKU!

my twin then told mum and dad theres like suddenly a few guys who kept texting and calling her.
and its true you know.

Mum: sape name budak tu?
Sis: Masrezal. abeh ade Sufyan.
M: abeh masrezal tu handsome tak?
Sis & Me: NO!!
S: he's my height.
M: okay canxellll. NEXT.
S: abeh kan due2 fireman. abeh kakak step kasi excuse ah yang ayah tak kasi kluar.
abeh die kate if u dun mind, let me talk to ur father.
M: kau pegi tanye die biar betol die nk jumpe ayah. kang kene kangggg.
Dad: cakap ngan die masok meminang!!
S: HA.
M: tanye si masrezal tu mak die name maspu'ah abeh bapak die name masagos. yang sufyan tu bilang die mak die name sopiyani( name bibik aku LOL), bapak die name sapuan, nanti die datang jumpe ayah die kene sapuan. tros tak jadi jumpe kau.
HAHAHA.
D: abeh adek kau ngan sape pulakk?
...
i ignored that question.
because the day before dad said to me to behave myself
cause apparently to him, i melt rather easily.
wtheckkk.

and,
dad will be back on friday.
then i'll fly on 13th. meet my brothers there. brothers kepe. bro and sis laa.
until then, i have the room all to myself.
and my exam is coming!
bye world!

2009-11-28T21:43:00.001+08:00

I DONT FUCKING CARE ANYMORE.

2009-11-27T12:25:00.000+08:00

peek toures.

girlfriend's over at my crib.
long day tomorrow.
goodnight.

tonight will be the last night

2009-11-26T21:57:00.004+08:00

been a breezy-then-busy week.
had movie with faris.
and then another movie with baby G today.
its been some time ive met bg cause he never went down for silat anymore.
working asshole.
i feel like walking beside a matrep just now.
hair highlighted and piercings all over.
but somehow, i think he looked better than before.
thanks people for the movies.

and thank you too to nur fazlin jumaen KERANA anda telah bersikap kejam terhadap saya.
fakeeee.
but yesterday, linny was mean! she made me jump to see her towel.
-______-
and im officially lighter than Fazlin. amek kau!
and linny got best pesilat on wed.
*shakes eyebrow*

and tell me,
do all boys watch porn?

anyways, ive been cooking just now after bathing.
and all i got was scoldings from mum cause apparently to her, i keep banging the stuffs.
and i dont know wheres the dry shrimps and everything.
double -_________-"
she keeps nagging laaaaa. i feel so depressed.
nak tolong nak dapat pahale jadi dapat dose buat member marah.
sambal goreng, rendang, ayam korma, ayam masak merah, sayur lodeh dan lontong.
Happy Aidiladha people.

somehow, i feel like leaving soon.
teach me how to be fearless of the dark.
somehow this supernatural beings are freaking me out.

2009-11-22T22:38:00.005+08:00

this one's for you.
babygirl, this is what you insert in your blog.

what's with guys nowadays?
always wanting girls to make the first move.
like what are they? are they roses waiting to
be pollinated by bees? for god's sakes, bloody hell,
you guys are MAN! we are WOman. ah, this is crazy.

and what's with texting other girls and loving other girls
when you've already have one lovely girlfriend by your side?
okay, if your girlfriend is not lovely, THATS A DIFFERENT THING.
and whats with praising other girls and not doing so to your
own girlfriend? why? because you already got the girl who you
once eyed. and since you've already got a girlfriend,
you think bitching with other girls is fine? and when will you
start realising how mean you could have been? WHEN YOUR
RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS SHAKY AND
YOU KNOW THAT IF YOU DON'T DO SOMETHING, IT WILL
BE GONE IN A SNAP! righttttt?

and im pleased that you asked me for advice.
even though im not good at advising and stuff, i think i can tell you some of my opinion.
you asked me if i had a boyfriend and it was already a 2 year relationship, would i do everything to save it?
i said yes. because to me, i dont want to start anything to break it. without any good reasons.
but the next time you tell me the whole story, i'd tell you; move on girl.

be with a man. who appreciate you for who you are.
and not for what you need to do for him, how you look like.
if you asked your man, how do i look?
and he just said "ok laaa" even though you dress up and put on make up so lovely that night just for him,
and he said another girl is cute when you asked her how SHE looked like,
and he kept repeating that SHE is cute,
and his text messages were so called "malas-nak-layan" type,
and there's just no love any more,
let it go baby.

its just not worth it. i know none of my relationship ever hit 2 years.
but sometimes people just get bored.
and i know you've been trying so hard to live on,
and continue and even though sometimes its the men's work, we ladies give in and do so,
just because we love them too much to let them go.
and the way i see he treats you, and the way his messages are changing so drastically,
its just too unacceptable.

he said SHE's just a lil sister (adek angkat) who he cares for, sayang, and looks after.
and when you ask, who am i then?
whats the difference between me as your girlfriend and your so called adek angkat?
and he said, both must care, must love, must text, must call.
but now, he's caring more for that ingrate than you.
what are you gonna do now nurul?
sit down and stare?
STAND UP AND DO WHAT YOU GOTTA DO LADY!

from what i see, you're letting him do what he's doing now,
and if you dont stop him, he will just keep doing it.
he enjoys it and just bitch around with those girls.
and you, suffer deep down inside looking and standing just few metres away from him,
while he's bitching around.
and his jokes weren't even funny and that ingrate laughed like hell.
annoying much?

sometimes people just dont understand that these men are in a relationship, got a girl,
but they just bitch around.
you, as a girlfriend gotta do something.
dont tell me you're gonna sit there and let your man get blow by that ingrate.
be a man now!
but if you think that he's just not gonna change,
and you're relatively "off" for the moment,
my opinion is, just let it go.

there are other guys like idontrememberhisname that says your smile is beautiful.
and you're sweet.
and will care for you.
and even though these people aren't good looking,
they are good enough inside to not tear you apart.
and i know you dont go for looks dear..
and you're just fourteen. you've got a long way to go.
like me. Lol. k i tue lagi skit ah. not very long ah!
there's alottt more better out there dear.
dont waste your heart on men/boys who dont treat you right.
they're just wasting your time!

and i fucking still digress on this,
you dont deserve this.
=(
as a notagirlnotyetawoman, i feel you babe.
but truly, my advice is, do what you think is right.
the decision is yours.
think wisely.
follow your heart but use your head.
thats all i have to say to you.
i cant say more as i dont want to make you confuse.
everything is up to you okay.
love you nurul.
and im here if you need me.

Yours truly,
the cheeky chicken.

2009-11-19T21:14:00.005+08:00

hello bintangs.
sorry ive not been updating.
haiii. i think i have more privacy in my private blog.
anyhooties, update of this week,
monday didnt go anywhere went straight home after school.
tuesday after school, we went to vivo city,
secretly bought a huge cake from secret recipe,
went barcelos and surprise surprise!
SEK KIM FANG'S 18th BIRTHDAY!
legal already siaaaaa xP

yesterday, didnt go silat training.
and i have no school on wednesdays. baik pe?!
finally, a holiday.
i went SSS with linny to see nurindahhh go up the stage.
saw alot of other peepzx there.
and have i ever mentioned here that zulkhairil is cute?
well, his brother is even cuter. and that safuwan soccer dude is.. diam ah lin!
nurin shy shy go up. haha. then the student leaders had to dance and all.
yan kelakar rabak. and lianaaa fuyoo. maut. in the blood!
ALL THE SINGLE LADIES!

today..
after school, went bishan cc. shafiqi came.
and then uncle sheik came.
and the first thing he ask was, where's my twin. -.-
the training was not very tiring but extremely tough.
because aku pantat is berat.
tapi tetap sekkk, so what to do..
i must say the training is very fun yet challenging.
finally the man knows my name. if not he keeps calling me twins twins twins.
haiiiii.

here i am now. tomorrow got training at school.
SHIKIN PLEASE DONT FORGET TO STUDY!
=)

cheers!

2009-11-15T01:42:00.001+08:00

happy 48th birthday daddy.
semoga panjang umur murah rezeki
and murah murah murah rezeki.
semoga menjadi suami yang berwibawa
dan ayah yang gerek dan relek ni sume decoy punya.

tomorrow, as in on the 16th,
my girlfriend's coming back.
anyone wanna follow me go fetch her,
text/call me.

and,
pleasedontwatchparanormalactivityitsucksanditsthemostboringhorrormovieihaveeverseenthankyou.
to me, its a waste of money.
im waiting for the fourth kind to be released.
and new moon will be released on 3rd dec!!
wanna watch before i leave for tha jungle.
anyways, my flight is confirmed. SilkAir airbus.
on 13th december i will be out of town till new year.
i still dislike the fact that im flying alone.
i dont think ayie will be following.
but, it will give me some time for myself.
and i will learn to handle my own luggage.
and if one day i were to run away overseas or something,
i would know what to do.
thats one nice thing.

bye asses~

2009-11-14T00:10:00.003+08:00

Thanks to Faris Haziq, Syafiq Sexy, Alif Fizwan, Nurindah Mursani, and
especially to this girl, Nur Fazlin for listening/giving me advices.
thanks to kak nadzirah and raudah for caring to listen.
eh korang opponent aku sey. awwwwwwwh.
im sure lin is bored of hearing everything that i have to say but she still listens.
thats why i love her.
Thanks to Faris for cheering me up. to Syafiq for persuading me to think of something happy,
to Alif for asking me to forget everything and go zirca this monday -__-"
and to Nurin for asking me to be more patient and calm.
i love you all.

i know i have ego.
and my ego is fucking tinggi.
but i have my reasons dear parents.
thanks la eh. " ni mesti aku bikin punye "
you dont know what im capable of doing to you.
i'll bite your balls out of you if you ever think of doing it again!!

Fuck us all

2009-11-12T22:53:00.003+08:00

i just need to blog.
my brother is seriously pissing me off
its giving me whiplash!
fuck.

mum always depended on me to take care of the house, ie to take care of my lil sis.
and all those other crap.
so this little fucker just couldn't stop disturbing lil sis till she kept crying and fucks.
and then, when i told him to clean the mess that he made, told him to stop acting like a girl,
and quit being a kid,
he went
" kau jangan nak step berbual macam jantan ah "
fuck this fucker.

and of course, i cannot take it and i asked him what he meant.
and then i dont know what happened, we were throwing punches and kicks to each other.
with our mouth still shouting.
if ain wasnt there, i knew both of us are gonna be badly injured.
so this fucker then bragged about what i said when shank was away.
fuck, im hardly at home to even have time to speak to him.
what the fuck did i do to him until he had to say such things about me?!!
and of course, as usual it ended with me crying so badly like i just lost my mother.
not even mum or dad can make me cry like how he always made me cry.
i cannot take it when this fucker keeps being rude to me.
as much as i want to use my head before i use my hand,
i cant seem to stop the reflex action of punching and kicking him.

ever since he stepped into sec school, and all my friends became his friends,
he just turned into this rude mother fuck.
even mum cried because he was fucking rude to her.
and he even had guts to steal at a madrasah.
fucking steal from his friend.
buat malu keluarge aku je.
and still say if im not happy with him as my brother,
can cancel bin abdul karim behind his name.

oh god, wouldn't that just be wonderful?
not having a fucking attitude mat rep in my fucking house.

thanks to him, my online tutorial got delayed.
i was so mad and choking with tears that i threw my laptop away.
and im not even done with my part of the project.
fuck him fuck him fuck him.

with all this happening, with his fucking poor attitude that i need to go through,
whats more with you, you, you, and you in my head,
and with my fucking schoolwork thats due,
i think im just totally fucked up.
i really have no one to talk to right now.
i think im just gonna lay back and cry.
cause thats all that im good at.
it will help.
thanks alot bro.

Drowning...

2009-11-09T21:45:00.000+08:00

on hiatus.

be back soon.

meanwhile, enjoy looking thru the archives.

if you know how to do so.

if not, find a way losers.

Byee.

2009-11-07T02:20:00.002+08:00

Faris just called me Pornstar.
i figured i think i will be the next one.
oh my oh my.
my secret is leaking...

Laugh out Loud.

Precious Flower...

2009-11-05T22:07:00.000+08:00

What the Modern Woman Wants...
By Amanda Chong Wei-Zhen

The old woman sat in the backseat of the magenta convertible as it
careened down the highway, clutching tightly to the plastic bag on her lap,
afraid it may be kidnapped by the wind. She was not used to such speed, with
trembling hands she pulled the seat belt tighter but was careful not to touch
the patent leather seats with her callused fingers, her daughter had warned
her not to dirty it, 'Fingerprints show very clearly on white, Ma.'

Her daughter, Bee Choo, was driving and talking on her sleek silver
mobile phone using big words the old woman could barely understand.
'Finance', 'Liquidation', 'Assets', 'Investments'... Her voice was crisp and
important and had an unfamiliar lilt to it.

Her Bee Choo sounded like one of those foreign girls on television.
She was speaking in an American accent.
The old lady clucked her tongue in disapproval...... 'I absolutely
cannot have this. We have to sell!' Her daughter exclaimed agitatedly as
she stepped on the accelerator; her perfectly manicured fingernails gripping
onto the steering wheel in irritation.

'I can't DEAL with this anymore!' she yelled as she clicked the
phone shut and hurled it angrily toward the backseat.. The mobile phone hit
the old woman on the forehead and nestled soundlessly into her lap. She
calmly picked it up and handed it to her daughter..

'Sorry, Ma,' she said, losing the American pretence and switching
to Mandarin. 'I have a big client in America . There have been a lot of
problems.'

The old lady nodded knowingly. Her daughter was big and
important.

Bee Choo stared at her mother from the rear view window, wondering
what she was thinking. Her mother's wrinkled countenance always carried the
same cryptic look. The phone began to ring again, an artificially cheerful
digital tune, which broke the awkward silence.

'Hello, Beatrice! Yes, this is Elaine.' Elaine. The old woman
cringed. I didn't name her Elaine. She remembered her daughter telling
her, how an English name was very important for 'networking', Chinese ones
being easily forgotten.

'Oh no, I can't see you for lunch today. I have to take the
ancient relic to the temple for her weird daily prayer ritual.'
Ancient Relic. The old woman understood perfectly it was
referring to her. Her daughter always assumed that her mother's silence
meant she did not comprehend.

'Yes, I know! My car seats will be reeking of joss sticks!' The
old woman pursed her lips tightly, her hands gripping her plastic bag in
defence.

The car curved smoothly into the temple courtyard. It looked
almost garish next to the dull sheen of the ageing temple's roof. The old
woman got out of the back seat, and made her unhurried way to the main hall.
Her daughter stepped out of the car in her business suit and
stilettos and reapplied her lipstick as she made her brisk way to her mother's
side.

'Ma, I'll wait outside.. I have an important phone call to make,'
she said, not bothering to hide her disgust at the pungent fumes of incense.
The old lady hobbled into the temple hall and lit a joss stick, she
knelt down solemnly and whispered her now familiar daily prayer to the Gods.
Thank you God of the Sky, you have given my daughter luck all these
years. Everything I prayed for, you have given her. She has everything a
young woman in this world could possibly want. She has a big house with a
swimming pool, a maid to help her, as she is too clumsy to sew or cook. Her
love life has been blessed; she is engaged to a rich and handsome angmoh man.
Her company is now the top financial firm and even men listen to what she
says... She lives the perfect life. You have given her everything except
happiness. I ask that the gods be merciful to her even if she has lost her
roots while reaping the harvest of success.

What you see is not true, she is a filial daughter to me. She
gives me a room in her big house and provides well for me. She is rude to me
only because I affect her happiness.. A young woman does not want to be
hindered by her old mother. It is my fault.

The old lady prayed so hard that tears welled up in her eyes.
Finally, with her head bowed in reverence she planted the half-burnt joss
stick into an urn of smoldering ashes.

She bowed once more. The old woman had been praying for her
daughter for thirty-two years. When her stomach was round like a melon, she
came to the temple and prayed that it was a son.
Then the time was ripe and the baby slipped out of her womb,
bawling and adorable with fat thighs and pink cheeks, but unmistakably, a
girl. Her husband had ticked and punched her for producing a useless baby
who could not work or carry the family name.

Still, the woman returned to the temple with her new-born girl tied
to her waist in a sarong and prayed that her daughter would grow up and have
everything she ever wanted.

Her husband left her and she prayed that her daughter would never
have to depend on a man. She prayed every day that her daughter would be a
great woman, the woman that she, meek and uneducated, could never become. A
woman with nengkan; the ability to do anything she set her mind to. A woman
who commanded respect in the hearts of men. When she opened her mouth to
speak, precious pearls would fall out and men would listen. She will not be
like me, the woman prayed as she watched her daughter grow up and drift away
from her, speaking a language she scarcely understood.

She watched her daughter transform from a quiet girl to one who
openly defied her, calling her laotu, old fashioned.... She wanted her
mother to be 'modern', a word so new there was no Chinese word for it.
Now her daughter was too clever for her and the old woman wondered
why she had prayed like that. The Gods had been faithful to her persistent
prayer, but the wealth and success that poured forth so richly had buried the
girl's roots and now she stood faceless with no identity, bound to the soil of
her ancestors by only a string of origami banknotes.

Her daughter had forgotten her mother's value. Her wants were so
ephemeral, that of a modern woman. Power, wealth, access to the best fashion
boutiques and yet her daughter had not found true happiness.
The old woman knew that you could find happiness with much less.
When her daughter left the earth, everything she had would count for
nothing. People would look to her legacy and say that she was a great woman
but she would be forgotten once the wind blows over, like the ashes of burnt
paper convertibles and mansions.

The old woman wished she could go back and erase all her big hopes
and prayers for her daughter now that she had looked out of the temple gates.
She saw her daughter speaking on the phone, her brow furrowed with anger and
worry. Being at the top is not good, the woman thought, there is only one
way to go from there – down.

The old woman carefully unfolded the plastic bag and spread out a
packet of beehoon in front of the altar. Her daughter often mocked her for
worshipping porcelain Gods. How could she pray to them so faithfully and
expect pieces of ceramic to fly to her aid? But her daughter had her own
gods too, idols of wealth, success and power that she enslaved to and
worshipped every day of her life.

Every day was a quest for the idols, and the idols she worshipped
counted for nothing in eternity. All the wants her daughter had would slowly
suck the life out of her and leave her, an empty souless shell at the altar.
The old woman watched the joss stick. The dull heat had left a
teetering grey stem that was on the danger of collapsing.

Modern woman nowadays, the old lady signed in resignation, as she
bowed to the east bone final time to end her ritual. Modern woman nowadays
want so much that they lose their souls and wonder whey they cannot find it.
Her joss stick disintegrated into a soft grey powder. She met her
daughter outside the temple, the same look of worry and frustration was etched
on her daughter's face.

An empty expression, as if she was ploughing through the soil of
her wants looking for the one thing that would sown the seeds of happiness.
They climbed into the convertible in silence and her daughter drove
along the highway, this time not to fast as she had done before.
‘Ma,’ Bee Choo finally said. "I don't know how to put this.
Mark and I have been talking about it and we plan to move out of the big
house. The property market is good now, and we managed to get a buyer
willing to pay us seven million for it. We decided we'd prefer a cosier
penthouse apartment instead. We found a perfect one in Orchard Road .. Once
we move into our apartment, we plan to get rid of the maid, so we can have
more space to ourselves....."

The old woman nodded knowingly. Bee Choo swallowed hard. "We'd
get someone to come in to do the housework and we can eat out – but once the
maid is gone, there won't be anyone to look after you. You will be awfully
lonely at home and, besides that the apartment is rather small. There won't
be space. We thought about it for a long time, and we decided the best thing
for you is if you moved to a Home. There's one near Hougang – it's a
Christian home and a very nice one."

The old woman did not raise an eyebrow. I"ve been there, the
matron is willing to take you in. It's beautiful with gardens and lots of
old people to keep you company! Hardly have time for you, you'd be happier
there." "You'd be happier there, really." her daughter repeated as if to
affirm herself.

This time the old woman had no plastic bag of food offering to
cling tightly to, she bit her lip and fastened her seat belt, as if it would
protect her from a daughter who did not want her anymore. She sunk deep into
the leather seat, letting her shoulders sag and her fingers trace the white
seat.

Ma, her daughter asked, searching the rear view window for her
mother. "Is everything okay?

What had to be done, had to be done. "Yes" she said firmly,
louder than she intended, 'if it will make you happy,' she added more
quietly.

‘It's for you, Ma! You will be happier there. You can move
there tomorrow, I already got the maid to pack your things.' Elaine said
triumphantly, mentally ticking yet another item off her agenda.
'I knew everything would be fine.' Elaine smiled widely; she felt
liberated. Perhaps getting rid of her mother would make her happier... She
had thought about it. It seemed the only hindrance in her pursuit of
happiness. She was happy now. She had everything a modern woman ever
wanted; money, status, career, love, power and now freedom without her mother
and her old-fashioned ways to weigh her down......

Yes she was free. Her phone butted urgently, she picked it up and
read the message, still beaming from ear to ear. "Stock 10% increase."
Yes, things were definitely beginning to look up for her and while
searching for the meaning of life in the luminance of her hand phone screen,
the old woman in the backseat became invisible and she did not see her in
tears.

*************************************************************************

So fellow friends, save enough for your old age and don't try to rely on your children.
Your responsibility is to give them the necessary education/training and life after that is theirs.
If they chose to look after you, it is a bonus and thank god for it.

Sing me another song

2009-11-04T22:21:00.002+08:00

hello bloghoppers/ people with nothing better to do, like me!

my day started out ...
i woke up in time, and then i took MRT. there was this abang abang CD uh.
one of them kept looking at me.
i was actually not happy with the weather so early in the morning.
its freaking hot, at 7+!
blasted my iPod. and then the one who kept looking at me was like standing closer and closer to me.
and then he kept purposely brush his hand at mine.
irritating GILER BABI.
felt like turning and Siku him!
buto, if it wasnt for the crowd i would have pushed him away.
what to do, early in the morning the train is so packed.

i got a text message from my girlfriend when i reached school.
i realised that message was sent some time ago and that she's already checked in.
my baby's away at Nepal now.
im freaking sad now cause i have no one to text,
besides ShankyD, Fazlinio whose been accompanying me since last few days.
Midah, come back quick okay, i'll fetch you at the airport, promise!

school.
practical starts the 8am timetable.
it was FUN.
we successfully transfer DNA and stuffs.
and my group's was like the most dominant can!
I Likeeee. the lecturer was like, yes laaaa, your one excellent la!
TEEHEE. i think im already marked by some teachers for being talkative and, loud.
there was this time that a lecturer said that if we do not have gloves, we can use condom to protect our hands, its of the same material.
and i went "Ooooooh so cooool"
it wasnt loud at all but the class was freaking quiet that everybody laughed at me.

i successfully installed Mathcad into my laptop!
(=

i got home at 9 just now.
silat training was surprisingly, tiring.
i got tired, thanks to circuit training.
and i guess i need to get back in shape, LIN IS NOW LIGHTER THAN ME!
tak bleh jadi! i was a kilo lighter the last time!
the training was fun anyways.
and lin niii. kept bullying me la!
asswipe!

anyhoots Nur Fazlin Juma'en,
sorry i cant follow you and the rest on sunday due to some unforeseen circumstances.
i have to go to "BBDC" to collect my "Certificate of Excellency" and my "License".
yay, finally. after 2 years of not getting top 3, i finally made it.
but i feel sad, cause im never number 1, its always either 2 or 3.
oh wait, got ah number 1. once only, top in class for PSLE =S
HAHAHAHA.

anyways, dinny gave me a recipe to make pancakes,
credits to him, my lil sis love it much much.
Thanks DIN! =)

i better get going, my body seems to be begging for a rest.
bye world.

2009-11-03T13:08:00.002+08:00

umm whatcha say?
are we in or are we out?
i miss pisang, mangkuk lin, jiffy, atul, raudah, nurul, aisyah, midah.
geezxzxzx.
bye all.
these assholes girls are a pain in the ass.

2009-11-01T21:05:00.003+08:00

im pissed, again.

with my mother my father my sister my brother.

actually brother not really ah, my cousin.

i woke up at ten, and then went back home.

and then took my shower after teaching malay to my lil sis.

and then i got ready. mum told me ustaz called and said i got top three.

not for driving laaa, for my religious class.

and then, i laughed so loud, because i only studied one paper.

and the other 2, i didnt study as i thought it would be basic knowledge/facts.

hahaha! then it turned out there was this questions about saidina umar or saidina usman.

so i answered the umar one and left the usman one blank.

N ITS CORRECT!

so yeah i laughed because it was easy.

need to pray also la. ahahha.

and then, i went into my room.

and then suddenly there were loud bangs and shoutings.

my mum just killed my twin sister.

no la, she found out my sis smoke when sis was sweeping the floor.

she went past her and then mum asked her to exhale, and then she got a tight slap from my mother.

since the day i was born, nobody ever slapped my face. so yeah, sis got it.

and you know, whenever dad gets mad and hit my twin when he found out she smokes,

she never uttered a word and no tears or emotions come out from her.

and just now, my dad was at JB, mum was the one who did it to her.

until she cried.

HAHA. I CANNOT BELIEVE SIA.

my cousin was the one who asked sis to buy ciggies.

so they both got scolded and shits.

and then kan, i went in to see how she's coping with the beatings.

makk, there were so many fucking marks/lines on her arms,thighs,legs.

and on her left arm, the blood on the skin almost come out.

kesian kan? but what to do.. people dont want to listen.

mum hated to hit us, because as a child, she was physically abused,

hit with wood, kayu sebesar besar mane ntah!, the belts,

all for what reasons? because my grandad's an ass.

because mum refused to wear gold bracelets to a wedding,

because he asked her to called someone, she dialled the phone so many times no one answered,

and she said "Tsk.."

and she got slapped on her back so many times with two hands of an angry father.

but she said, she had to do it, for the sake of her child's future.

who apparently wont listen.

and then, i went out with midah.

had fun yadayada.

and then after like 5hours plus outside, they started calling.

and shouting on the phone.

How am i supposed to not get deaf/listen to you when you keep shouting on the phone?

How am i supposed to respect you when you cant even talk nicely?

so i just keep quiet. malas nk layan orang yang tak tenang.

he said i keep coming home late.

wahh part aku balik lambat skola kene bising, part anak die lagi satu balik lambat giler sampai pagi die tak check.

@#$#%$^&*!!!!!!

i went back home and here i am.

i hate it la.

i have a fucking angry household full of scoldings and hatred and fucks.

i wish to run away and get this fuckers out of my head for a lil while can or not?

fuck this shit.

2009-11-01T00:17:00.003+08:00

im pissed.

im currently at busu's crib.

watching Man Utd Vs Blackburn later.

Dad came into my room just now and ask me to pray.

i said yes i will and he off the wireless.

BINGIT SAK AKU.

he always do that to piss me off.

so i decided to pack my bag and run 3 blocks away to my uncle's place.

freaking annoying okeh if u online then suddenly you cant surf back.

im in the middle of something okay!

its okay now, the lil kids here are entertaining me.

they're freaking cuteeeeeeeeeeeee okeh!

aku nak baby!

so yesterday was ok, saturday's training was basically tire-less.

we only recapped yellow belt syllabus.

and can i tell u guys something?

my left finger is trembling/menggigil on its own. when i even made my fingers straighter,

it tremble more.

my right forefinger however, is not experiencing such happenings.

i ask myself, what did i do?

and i think perhaps God wants me to stop whatever im doing,

so yeah, ive learnt my lesson, i hope.

anyhooties, pray that my left forefinger will stop moving on its own will.

and tomorrow ive got a date with my girlfriend.

i want to hug hug hug hug her.

i feel so helpless now.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

anyways, here's a line i keep saying in class and to friends.

Wait for the right guy but in the meantime, have fun with all of the wrong ones.

And apparently Linny likes it.

thats why she keeps doing it when she's with her boyf kan?!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

okokok, goodnight all.

Current Game

Fulham Vs Liverpool

2-1

76:25

i think im just going to sleep. my eyes are heavy.

AND MY SONY HANDPHONE WORKS ALREADY!

TEEHEEE.

im thinking of getting an iphone. grrrr.

*edits*

Fulham 3 Liverpool 1

AHAHAHHA! HAPPY AKU!

2009-10-30T13:31:00.004+08:00

happy 17th birthday baby.

love u soooo much.

jumpe gue besok ogay! (: xoxoxoxoxo!

besok dapat huge kiss!

I LOVE YOU. SO MUCH BESTFRIEND.

SEE I KEEP EMPHASISING ON IT!

2009-10-29T22:21:00.002+08:00

HAPPY 500TH POST!

anyhoots, i realised that ive been listening to class most of the time.

a great difference if u compare with sem 1.

tomorrow im going silat with linny.

i cant tahan, i need to exercise.

and i finish at 5 exactly tomorrow. kecohzx.

so tomorrow is gonna be a freaking long day. 8am-7pm~

and i successfully persuaded Princess Qilla Abd Karim to join silat back.

she's the youngest team member way back then. then stopped 2 years later.

so, most probably, she's going to join back. she finally grow up,

and sees that she wants the fun that we're having.

and mind you, die da jatuhkan aku tadi.

i asked her to hold my leg and then she threw me backwards.

kurang asam peh budak!

and she punch quite hard too.

just need to push away back some of the shyness.

macam kakak die jugak la.

HAHAHAHHA! aku shy kape?!

so, lil sis was wearing her silat uni that was bought when she was 3. and now she's 7.

and it still fits! HAHAHAHA.

anyways, its been how many days since ive seen my fucking gay twin sister.

she's out for camps and all. instructor la seh. and dapat ton dalam hutan babe.

cool ke ape. one time, she had to stay in the forest alone and not allowed to on the torch,

so she called mum so that she got company.

and she's getting richer than me. fookzx. and yeah, IM BROKE.

its been ages since ive talked to my lil bro.

and its been quite some time that i didnt spend quality time with nenek.

and i cant even remember the last time i spoke to atok.

and guess what, we all live under one roof.

pffft.

ive been going home very late this days and dad's pretty prepped up about it.

he said im not focus on my education.

perhh. okay, i will focus okayyyyyyy.

on the kinky side, FAZLINIO has been telling me stuffs she shouldn't let a person like me know.

cause i wont stop asking and shits.

aku senang get excited pasal bende bende ni sume.

its natural to me.

and imma BIG FAN of it. aku suke sangat sangat! ((=

lin, bleh tak? hahahaha. okay okay okay!

i went to causeway point just now to meet my mummy.

she was talking to some random people whom i do not know and start telling them that im a golden tiger.

kurang asem kan, i know my hair colour is not.. natural.

but then, i like it. and i like it.. haha!

so, we ate at LJS, i shud have taken the Salmon la. the grilled fish dont even have taste! besides the gravy!

and then mum started talking about her problems with atuk,

and then we bought alot of stuff at body shop.

and then met daddy before we spent at charles & keith.

mum bought like 3 pairs of shoes, wait 4 i think.

and i get myself a new wallet!

and! im pleased edward texted me today.

and aku is happy. so yeah.

im pissed actually about yesterday. i spilled some beans.

it was a fucking accident. but in the end, he knows something.

but then, im glad i twisted some story in it and he didnt get any final product.

but overall, my day was fine. i love them both still.

just if that smaller one keeps his mouth shut.

which i believe he wont.

and nur fazlin juma'en!

alaaa, aku suke la. alamak!

anw, jumpe kau esok!!

and i have my private blog up already.

ask to read! and if fazlin asked, she would most probably be number one on my list.

if you've been reading my blog, you know whats my blog content will be like.

to orang orang yang terase, and i dont mean only one person,

i mean people!

Dont fall in love, Boy im not the one,

no emotions bayy, we're just having fun,

all im gonna do is hurt you...

Dont fall in love with me darling, dont fall in love,

cause all im gonna do is break your heart.

maaf kate.

and here's something to all those confused hearts out there,

If he’s the one you want, the one you love,and the only one who can make you happy, then no matter how long you’ve liked him, and no matter what people say, you should keep waiting.

thats all folks!

2009-10-27T20:27:00.004+08:00

birthday boy, my sexy hotbod.

more pics of me and linny on fb!

GOODNIGHT HOTSTUFFS!

2009-10-27T12:30:00.002+08:00

my blog song makes me wanna dance. i feel like going clubbing.

-______-

muke aku bukan gi clubbing nak miang k. i love music.

theres a party on nov 16. 16 and above. any takers?

anyhoots, i had chem prac just now.

played with acid. and then i made the acid become crystals.

COOL GILE BABYZX!!!

and then i melt the crystals at 123.5 degree celcius. cool gilerrrrrrrr.

and, i just farted in the library. this is the first time the gang actually heard it cause its very loud.

and then the smell suddenly come. it never come before since when when seh.

so bad laaaaaaa. grrr.

i feel like shitting now.

SHIT.

later im going bishan to meet my MONYET! hamida lala lalaaaa~

anyways, lin probably understands why its sad to hear all that stories.

kampret la, perangai adik adik ah kalau pompuan gadoh because of a guy.

PLEASE LA EH.

perangai aku tak macam gitu la. %$#@*!!!

and i never said anything to any of you. how come the whole world knows?

grrrrrr.

da sudah olang olang.

lets go clubbing sua.

byeee~

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JERICHO MY 6PACK CLASSMATE!

AND IM WITH LINNY NOWWW!

WOOOHOOOOOOOOOO!!

2009-10-25T23:18:00.002+08:00

ku masih setia.

romeo save me, ive been feeling so alone,

i keep waiting for you but you never come,

is this in my head i dont know what to think,

he knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring.

2009-10-24T02:15:00.002+08:00

thanks Fazlin and Ael for today.

my day was okay, but in the end i made up my mind not to go Silat.

so i texted linny and asked if she would want to stick to original plan, Night Safari.

then she said okay so we called Ael. i finish at 5. and then rushed home, prayed, rush out again.

lin said i salah solat thats why my phone create problems. perangai sungai betol.

and then we met some faces at Lot 1. haaaaa~

and then met ael, made our way to NS. and then met haiqal.

thanks to him, we got admission freee babezxzx.

hahaha, and haiqal came in this halloween suit. he masked himself.

but soon after i knew which one was him already.

Lin kate aku kutok cara die jalan, kurang asam kan?

i didnt say anythingggg. i kept farting along the way though.

and then my security guard nurin came with her bunch of friends and coach.

& lin's scandal was there.

i remembered i bullied him during IVP.

HAHAHAHA. Atul boncet!

anyw, we walked to the bridge with no return and stuff.

there was this "ghost" who was stoning la.

and then i pinched his cheeks and ran away. LOL.

the tram ride was fun. we entered neverland.

and then there were "ghosts" everywhere.

there was this ghost who went "ROARRRR! "

i know he was a malay so i pushed him a lil and said to him, " da da da go down now "

and then the f ghost stared at me laaaaaaaaaaaaa.

along the way i just buried my face into my towel on lin's shoulder. hahahaha!!

they're very good at it liao. stare with this scary look!

anyhoo, thanks many many to haiqal for the free admission.

and next time we must walk the trail to see the babis more clearly.

went towards cck mrt together with them, ate at lot 1 with linny and nurin.

and then went off towards woodlands.

my freaking sony is pissing me now. its not even a year yet and its been making problems.

tomorrow i have Demo at bishan.

geezx im tired now.

goodnight everybody!

2009-10-23T10:13:00.002+08:00

It used to be like this. the first try, now i think its more to gold.

geezx. when you guys see me, you'll know.

the outstanding ones (;

and my sis is returning home today.

she went for the camp as instructor. and will be $180 richer than me.

pffft.

inorganic, organic chemistry!

IM LOVING MATHS IN SCHOOL. DIFFERENTIATION.

at this point of time only.

First week of school is really not bad. i think im gonna love odd weeks.

haf alot of free time. i haf 3 hours break later. in which i will spend to do something useful.

i hope.

i haf silat later @sp. my eyes are so tired. maybe i'll skip. see how.

tomorrow having the demo. zzzzz.

and im looking forward to sunday cause i wanna do my exam paper. hahaha.

want my results fast!

MAKE ME TOP 3 PLEASE!

cause they will give cash! HAHAHAHA.

bye all!

2009-10-22T23:08:00.001+08:00

im sick.

when all i want is you.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

GOODNIGHT KIDS!

2009-10-20T20:32:00.001+08:00

today's my second day of school.

now is the Report Writing and Presentation module. (RWP)

it is boring but i get to write. its been a long time since i used a paper and pen.

yesterday started at 8am. first module was Love Relations - A journey of Romance, Love and Sexuality.

i waited for Syafiq Gerek till we were late for class.

but it was okay, the class was not lively at first. we watch videos, played games yadayada.

must parner with guys! sigh. next time must partner with random guys cause fiq dont trust me.

there was this game where i had to fall and he must catch me. grr. member tak catch aku.

no trust!

and then we got a really long break.

played soccer on the table thingy, laughed like hell.

they played pool. while i surf the net.

it was fun.

overall my first day was fun.

hope it will be like this the whole sem!

today, had the RWP for only 2 hours! GEEZX.

tomorrow i end at 1pm ^^ and

*edit*

i got so bored that i took pictures?

yeah. kay la. i think i want to dye my hair- again.

geezx. and im thinking of copying meh's shavy hairstyle!

confirm cool gileh! [:

and today i got angry cause my twin used my jacket.

and she said i was using her slippers.

she used my slippers like more thank 100000000 XXXX!

and i didnt say anything. and i only used her slips once!

and about the jacket, she had the SAME one! exact one. we bought at uniqlo together.

and she used mine. tak peh bingit aku.

pegi ah mintak balik dari teman istimewa lu!

bikin gua panas!

and i accept the fact that although we love our siblings more than we love our friends, we treat our friends/outsiders better.

but its always up to the individual to SHOW/PRESENT how to love their friends in front of their siblings ehhhh.

sigh. besar tak besar la brader.

ehhhh, salah topik. kay da bye.

i miss my boyfriend macam fishes miss their gills!

tomorrow training. -_-

2009-10-18T17:21:00.000+08:00

2009-10-18T00:08:00.003+08:00

school is starting monday.

and i dont know whether gems will start that soon.

now my monday is from 8-6. damn it!

just now came down late cause nobody informed us anything.

sad right. but went to raudah's house.

get to eat, and then chat with the boys and i had a great time laughing =)

and you know my lil sis put in her fb. "orang keling happy deepavali!"

kurang ajar kan tu budak. and then she keeps crying when she cannot get all the things she haf to study in her head.

anyways, did i tell daddy is sending my twin and bro off to somewhere very ulu and foresty to give them a lesson?

yeah, they're sending them off next month. and im stuck here in singapore with my lil sis.

and then they will come back, and leave the 2 hardheads there.

an old great granduncle are gonna teach them something that would most probably change their way of life.

i want to go but sadly, im schooling. so mummy asked if i dare to go there myself.

i said of course but daddy said its dangerous to go alone ):

anyhoo, maybe i will go myself. i really want to learn something. its such a waste if i dont go.

im going off now. bye world.

i feel so fuckin empty now.

bye bye bye bye bye!

2009-10-17T17:08:00.001+08:00

ONE LESS LONELY GIRL.

2009-10-17T15:36:00.001+08:00

tomorrow's my maddy exam.

for kyla.

1A.

Syarat Wajib Puasa

1. Beragama Islam

2.Baligh

3. Berakal

4. Bebas daripada uzur Syar'ie

Terdapat uzur syar'ie yang menegah daripada berpuasa, dan ada pula uzur yang mengharuskan berbuka puasa.

Uzur Syar'ie yang menegah daripada berpuasa ialah:

(a) keluar darah haid

(b) keluar darah nifas

(c)pitam atau pengsan sepanjang hari

Erti Puasa.

Dari segi bahasa bermaksud menahan diri daripada sesuatu.

Dari sudut istilah syarak bermaksud menahan diri daripada melakukan perkara yang membatalkan puasa bermula dari terbit fajar sadiq hingga terbenam matahari yang disertakan niat.

Perkara yang membatalkan puasa.

1. Makan dan minum dengan sengaja.

2. Keluar darah haid atau nifas.

3.Muntah dengan sengaja.

4. Berjimak pada siang hari.

5. Pengsan sepanjang hari.

6. Melahirkan anak.

7. Mengeluarkan air mani dengan sengaja.

8. Gila.

9. Memasukkan sesuatu ke dalam rongga hingga sampai ke halkum atau perut.

10. Murtad iaitu keluar daripada agama Islam.

Hari Hari diharamkan berpuasa.

2 Hari Raya iaitu 1 Syawal dan 10 Zulhijjah.

Hari hari Tasyrik iaitu 11,12,13 Zulhijjah.

Hikmat Berpuasa.

1. Melatih diri dengan sifat sabar dan ikhlas.

2. menjana kekuatan dan ketenangan jiwa.

3. menimbulkan perasaan keinsafan dan belas kasihan terhadap golongan fakir miskin.

4. melatih jiwa supaya bersih daripada sifat-sifat mazmumah.

5. memberi kesegaran dan kesihatan pada tubuh badan.

6. memberi kerehatan kepada sistem penghadaman.

Pengertian Qasar dan Jamak.

Dari segi istilah syarak, solat qasar bermaksud memendekkan solat empat rakaat menjadi dua rakaat.

Menurut istilah syarak, solat jamak bermaksud menghimpunkan dua solat fardhu dalam satu waktu dengan syarat syarat tertentu.

Antara syarat perjalanan yang diharuskan menjamak dan mengqasarkan solat ialah:

1. musafir yang tidak bertujuan maksiat.

2. destinasi yang dituju melebihi dua marhalah.

3. mengetahui destinasi yang dituju.

Solat Qasar:

memendekkan solat empat rakaat menjadi dua rakaat.

Solat yang boleh diqasarkan islah solat zuhur, asar dan isyak.

Syarat solat qasar ialah seperti berikut:

1. hendaklah melepasi sempadan tempat tinggal.

2. tidak berniat bermukmin melebihi empat hari.

3. tidak berimamkan kepada imam yang sempurna rakaatnya.

4. masih dalam keadaan musafir ketika mengerjakan solat qasar.

2A.

Perbezaan Sifat Malaikat dengan Sifat Manusia.

1. Tidak ada jantina samada lelaki atau perempuan dan bukannya pondan.

2. Berakal dan tidak bernafsu.

3. Tidak berkahwin dan berketurunan.

4. Tidak makan, tidak minum, tidak rehat, dan tidak tidur.

5. Tidak dapat dikesan oleh pancaindera manusia.

6. Tidak pernah melakukan maksiat atau dosa.

7. Sentiasa beribadat dan taat pada Allah.

Nama dan tugas malaikat yang wajib diketahui.

1. Jibrail - menyampaikan wahyu Allah kepada Rasul dan nabi.

2. Mikail - menurunkan hujan dan menguruskan pembahagian rezeki.

3. Israfil - meniup sangkakala kiamat sebanyak dua kali. Kali pertama menandakan berlakunya kehancuran alam. Kedua menandakan bahawa manusia dihidupkan semula untuk dihimpunkan di Padang Mahsyar.

4. Izrail - mencabut nyawa setiap makhluk yang bernyawa.

5. Munkar - menyoal orang mati samada dalam kubur atau yang tidak berkubur.

6. Nakir - sama tugasnya seperti malaikat Munkar.

7. Raqib - mencatat amalam kebaikan manusia.

8. Atid - mencatat amalan kejahatan manusia.

9. Ridhwan - menjaga syurga.

10. Malik - menjaga neraka.

2B.

Cara Syaitan memperdaya manusia.

Iblis atau syaitan menggoda manusia dengan berbagai-bagai cara contohnya:

1. memperdayakan manusia supaya mensyirikkan Allah SWT

2. menghasut manusia supaya melakukan kejahatan dan menjauhi kebaikan.

3. memperdayakan manusia supaya tidak mengerjakan ibadat kepada Allah SWT.

4. menggoda manusia supaya hidup bermusuhan.

5. mebisikkan manusia dengan keja sia-sia.

Orang yang lemah imannya akan tergoda dengan hasutan dan pujukan syaitan.

Beberapa akibat kerana tergoda dengan tipu daya syaitan termasuklah,

1. mendapat balasan azab daripada Allah SWT.

2. dijauhi daripada petunjuh dan hidayat Allah SWT.

3. mendapat kesusahan hidup di dunia dan di akhirat.

4. mudah terdorong untuk melakukan kemungkaran.

Cara Menghindari tipu daya Syaitan.

1. membanyakkan membaca Al-Quran dan berzikir.

2. sentiasa beribadat sama ada ibadat khusus atau ibadat umum.

3. mengerjakan perintah Allah SWT dengan hati yang ikhlas.

4. menghadiri kelas-kelas pengajian agama.

5. tidak melibatkan diri dengan perkara-perkara yang ditegah oleh Allah SWT.

thats all we need to know for tomorrow, i think.

i feel sinful now.

God forgive me.

bye :'(

kupu kupu malam

2009-10-16T21:56:00.006+08:00

hello world.

i had a great time last night with shanky, midah, raudah, meh, reena, wawa, shady and bush.

i spent more time with midah before that.

i love her la. boleh? hahaha.

she make me laugh like hell.

midah: xiu yan pakai IC kakak die nak masok club. abeh lepas seh. brape banyak kali.

me: eh? oh bagus la....

midah: kalau aku pakai kakak aku punye, haii, different habes! macam ikan dengan beruang.

me: HAHAHAHA. (thinking that she was saying beruang was herself)

midah: eh, kakak aku yang beruang tau, aku yang ikan!

me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! perasaan. padahal kakak kau lagi putih dari kau.

midah: eh, aku ade darah india ape.

another one.

midah: dulu aku gi sentosa ngan kakak aku naik ape tu, yang tinggu tu la.

me: skytrain?

midah: bukannn.

shanky: Luge?

midah: bukan la.

me: luge kan yang bawak kerete tu kan.

midah: alaa yang tinggi bleh nampak clouds.

me: monorail! (hahahaha confident!)

midah: kepaleotak kau! cabin..hmm bukan la cabinet!!!

shanky: Cable car laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! the way she said cabinet, she was ssooooo damn confident it was right.

that cracked me up.

anyways, yesterday we went to vivo to have our dinner cum supper.

let me teach you tips to get free stuffs at long john okay.

there's a bell there, it says "ring the bell if you like my smile", that means if the customer likes the cashier's smile, she/he shud ring the bell.

we came up to the counter, before he starts speaking, you ring the bell.

and then he will say thank you, and smile all the way.

and then you let your friend order, when its your turn you say you want two fish and fries. you want your drink ice tea and an extra salsa cheese.

tell him you want a chocolate cream pie and he tells you its out. they ran out of choc pies.

so you tell him, you dont have those pies, you have to give me a free coselaw.

and you smile your most flirtish smile and you bat your eyelash, and you look straight into his face until he cannot say anything.

and then he will give you what you want.

HAHA.

and then before you leave the counter, RING THE BELL SO MANY TIMES UNTIL HE BLUSH OKAY!

crappy chinaman!

i swear we took such a long time until the queue reached the other store opposite.

sis had to pay for her coselaw though, midah said she didnt try hard enough.

and then, after eating, i had a shock. cause i saw my ex boyfriend. the last time i saw him was before we break up and that was a long time ago.

and he's changed, like how ive changed. people change kan midah. (:

and then we went out and he and his team also went. it was very awkward to me cause i knew he didnt smoke.

yes, i was very shocked. but whatever la.

and then shady came with bush. the last time i saw him was in secondary school.

bush is still shorter than me! =X

and then we head over to PH.

walked in, went out, they did their stuff, went back in, had fun.

Raudah came. =)))

you know faruq said he would have come if i told him you'd be there. chey kembeng.

and then, harris called me.

midah macam bising gitu yang harris ade, abeh die excited tak tentu pasal.

si member asik asik call aku, sampai buat aku matikan cell aku.

mengganggu sungguh.

khalist was there. i was kinda surprised to see him.

the thing ended at 3. and we sat at harbourfront centre until 7.

i know, hopeless butterflies.

bus-ed back to woodlands and reach around 9.

daddy was at home. =X

bathed, slept with midah and shanky, and midah left at 2pm.

slept until 5. went out to town for dinner.

and here i am now.

im still tired. and im bored now.

and i miss my baby like the coconut miss the trees!

thanks all for making my night. somehow it washed away some of the things thats been bugging my mind. and i had fun with my girls. it wouldn't be the same without them.

im not a frequent clubber. i only dance once in a while.

its just for fun, and for the love of music!

my sis said i was menjeng but i believed i wasnt that bad.

it wasnt my best time yet *winks*

oh pictures grab it now!

shady. my good friend's ex boyfriend -___-

sugar mummy midah!!!! HAHAHAHAHA.

bye world.

2009-10-15T02:34:00.003+08:00

i dont like this feeling.

i dont get why she is contacting you again,

its not that im jealous that she will get you back,

you will be closer, or anything.

because i know whats best for you.

please dont. i feel that these people only search for us,

when they dont have anyone else by their side,

its not only that, the way they treated us back then,

was not even half of the good things we've done for them.

the days we actually pitied them and gave them money to eat,

and all those little things we've done for them.

if she has decided to leave, then leave.

i dont appreciate this thought of moving forward.

and like i said, one day we will regret knowing them.

and in the end, everything busts up!

can we please, move this people aside,

cause they mean nothing to me.

but as a friend, i respect your decision,

and i dont care if you wanna start over this friendship,

but im backing off before it even started.

baby please, we're happy now aren't we?

this is for my bff. i hope you get me sayang.

im arousingly waiting to start falling in love with you all over again.

i believe that good things will come to those who wait.

its just a matter of time, if we can take it slow everything will be alright.

and i know that we'll find, its just a matter of time.

cause every cloud has a silver lining (:

and there's a thousand different reasons why i think my faith for him is that strong.

i think only me and myself will understand.

2009-10-13T23:42:00.006+08:00

im really upset today.

i wished i would have just stayed in singapore and spend my day with fazlin before she went off.

went jb with my parents and twin. they massaged their bodies. waited for mum for like more than an hour, before we made our way to this other outlet where mum says we shud get out legs massaged.

the old woman who tekan my leg was frail but her energy caught me unguarded.

i feel sharp pains everytime she massaged this particular part of my thighs, legs and feet.

i think im growing old. and sucky.

why im upset?

i think that i have been using every single cent of mine to get things that i want,

and she can get hers like just after she say it.

like how she got the S$130++ crumpler bag, her nike shoes, her goddamn nice nike slippers that she got just now.

i have to use my money to buy the bag i got from guess.

and i cant even remember the last time they got me something.

its very very sad. when they say go look at something that i want, go see what you want,

and then they say forget it, and my twin gets what she wants.

its really very sad. i dont know how many times i have to complain to this blog of mine about this.

i cant say it to anyone directly cause they just dont fucking understand.

im not trying to be hard to deal with or materialistic. but come on, i do have feelings.

and i shall say this again after how many times ive said it,

i fucking hate people who gives me false hopes.

if you dont want to get me the things that i want, dont tempt me by asking me to go look for it.

and end up saying no, its not worth it or anything. bullshit.

i still remember how sister complained to me about not getting the giordano khakis that she want after she tried them on,

and i get my jeans. but you know what? i bought them with my own money.

i know life is unfair and i always tell myself that.

and i dont know when my sparkling time will come where it will be others who have to despair.

and you dont have to get me the things i dont want, things i dont need,

and fucking bring it up. damn i had a bad day.

and im not gonna cry about it. this happens alot of time, but please,

dont ever ask me out again just to disappoint me and ruin my day.

nobody's perfect and you know it. no wonder my little sister says that both you choose love.

will wonders never cease.

and im going to ECP's bbq pit tmrw.

any souls not happy with their life/kurang kasih sayang [KKS] or feel sorry for me and want to accompany me,

please do so. you can text me at 91157542.

TERIMA KASIH CINTA

2009-10-13T12:10:00.004+08:00

current fav song aku. baby kept asking what this song is after i sang in the bus.

terpaut kat suare aku tu, bukan lagu. ahahahhhahaa!

i woke up early in the morning to send nenek to doc.

bought stuffs for her after that. made our way home.

before i got the chance to sit, atok asked me to urut him.

then before i can go to my room, he asked me to withdraw money for him.

that old man has alot of cash sey. grr.

i tink im the only grandchild that he trusts in terms with money.

and yesterday i bought havaianas too.

thanks midah for influencing me to get one.

(: i think i looked handsome today. HAHAHA.

anyway im supposed to meet Lin just now to school to apply for LOA.

but i cant babe. sorry.

and i cant make it for tonight too v sorry ):

im going JB again.

bye world!

2009-10-12T23:29:00.002+08:00

hello patron tequilas and margaritas!

i had a great day with midah lawa. eh midah lala. bile mase die lawa.

-___________-"

anyways, we met at somerset at 1. then went to buy our tickets. went to have our breakfast cum lunch at cahaya.

i really think if u guys wanna eat there, dont go at the front one where there's alot of space. the food there was never prepared with love.

while at the back, i had the nicest claypot chicken rice.

remember okay!

made our way to cineleisure. saw ahmeera bella shark and gang.

rindu! and i dont know why apparently alot of minahs kening two point zero punye keep staring at me.

ade hutang ka! dohhh! (:

watched Fame. i still think it wasnt a good movie and i wanna catch sorority row i dont care.

cause fame is like a normal ordinary plain movie. without any good storylines.

i think step up 1 and 2 are still better than this.

and there's only ONE, i REPEAT ONE kissing part in the show.

i know its sinful for my eyes to see but the guys are freaking hot why you kiss so little?

grrrrrr. and the Marco or his real name, Asher Book( i think) was cute only during freshman and sophomore year.

after that, his hair sucked. and then his girl, i forgot her name, see how i forgot the unimportant people, made out with this hot actor. and she was like, NO LEAVE ME ALONE, to that actor.

wah, betol peh sayang. -___-

anyways, i rate it 2.5/5 watch it if you only have nothing better to do.

i dont enjoy the movie, period.

seee, i still think we should have watched sorority row, there's a story in it. and a good one.

please ask me out to watch it anyone. thanks.

i went shopping today, and i spent more than $150. as im not working, i still think thats hard money. cause my parents never give me cash for shopping, alone. as in when i shop myself. i never asked. its funny sometimes when i hear my girlfriends ask for money to shop from their parents. so good~

anyhoots, i kinda like punkstar's tees. ive got like 3 of it now. its hard to spend alot on them when one cost like $22-25. yeah -_- and i mean alot as in 5-8.

you dont get the feel when you buy only one.

and i made my way to lucky plaza where we window shopped and bought a pair of pants.

and then we went to ion. lepak-ed at CBTL. i miss working suddenly. but thank god im not cause working in CBTL is freaking tiring. your legs can go off.

had plain bagel with cream cheese. and shared spicy tuna linguine with midah.

and our hot double chocolate. i still think the ones i made are nicer. :P

and then we head to cotton on wisma, which had little varieties. so finally we made our way to novena, velocity. and the outlet is bigggggg. combined with cotton body and stuff.

bought tops and bottoms.

and then headed home. after reaching home then i realised we didnt go Animal.

damn. ni la midah ampu aku!

and finally, PICTURES UP ON FACEBOOK!

2009-10-12T00:20:00.004+08:00

sorry guys that i didnt uploaded all pictures to facebook.

yesterday i was too tired that i didnt continue and today facebook is soooo lagging that i cant even upload a picture.

sorry kay esok boleh!

anyways i have a date tomorrow with my bff midah giler.

i better go out before holidays start!

okay bye. just wannna say sorry k babies. stay tuned for the more beautifool pictures!

2009-10-11T01:01:00.002+08:00

hello asses.

i swear my nose is killing me.

hate it so much when there's roadblock in there.

i slept at nek imah's house. cause my head was so tight and i swallowed panadols.

it helps in making me sleepy so the pain got away once i got up.

tok dollah's house is freaking cozy man. i love it and its freaking cheap, the price of a 3-room flat in singapore.

i really think we should migrate there. really no kidding.

anyways, the pakciks are really cool, one of them were mixed indian and he said,

at least aku DKK daripade die DKP.

DKK= darah keturunan keling

DKP= darah keling pariah.

-_______-"

anyways, raya with UC was unexpectedly fun.

thanks to eping and raudah and the crew.

theres eping,awel,baby,giggs,arep,fairzul,ayie,aisyah,midah,raudah,fiqah,shanky,nurul,mira and myself. imran was not around though.

i really love the set of people who went out together last night.

lets remain that way, shall we?

cause that's UC (;

we managed to go 10 houses, and all houses there's food!

i didnt eat at all houses cause my tummy couldn't take in the load.

went abg bear's house and watched our demo video at mountbatten cc.

i think i looked handsome when im doing seni. HAHAHAHA.

final house was eping's. thanks to his parents for sending us back home.

really appreciate it alot.

next year we shall not take public transport or hire a bus okay, some of us are gonna get our licenses and we'll drive us all around (;

anyways, the girls are planning to go someplace fun on thursday night.

i wanna go and enjoy myself!!! ((((= after months~

and i wanna meet midah this week okay! love u kedondong.

pictures are uploaded to facebook. and some videos too.

stay tuned!

2009-10-07T21:40:00.000+08:00

timetable out.

Monday: 11.30am-2.30pm basic microbiology practical.
4pm-6pm innovation design & enterprise in action (IDEAs)

Tuesday: 8am-11am inorganic & organic chemistry practical. (only in even weeks)
1pm-2pm cell biology tutorial
2pm-4pm report writing and presentation tutorial
4pm-5pm basic microbiology lecture

Wednesday: 8am-11am cell biology practical
12pm-1pm basic microbiology tutorial

Thursday: 10am-11am Mathematics B lecture
11am-1pm Mathematics B tutorial
2pm-4pm cell biology lecture

Friday: 8am-10am Mathematics B lecture
10am-11am Inorganic & Organic Chemistry lecture
11am-12pm Inorganic & Organic Chemistry tutorial
3pm-5pm Inorganic & Organic Chemistry lecture

Please note : -
All full time students will receive 4 registration appointments. Your 1st main registration appointment will start on the 12 Oct or 13 Oct or 14 Oct 2009.
Login to SAS on Sun, 11 Oct 2009 (one day before registration starts) to confirm your appointment dates and timeslots.
Only students who are required to take GEM in AY2009/10 Semester 2 are required to register. The rest can ignore their registration appointments.

For School of Chemical & Life Sciences, our appointment date is on 12th october 2009.

im thinking of taking the GEM Love Relations For Life – A Journey of Romance, Love & Sexuality (MS505A) . it sounds fun. haha. or perhaps Music Appreciation (ET503A).
guys, get back to me on what you people are planning to go to. i dont want to end up in a class with no one that i know. im planning to go on to a class as Fazlin's. we're still waiting for her timetable to be out. that cacat member came to my house and then my dad came into my room while we were watching a video. no we dont watch porn. kan lin! LOL.

(:

i hate my timetable. cause my friday ends at 5pm. for god's sake, fridays must end early la!!
and last semester, we got one day a tueday where we end school at 1030am. now no more ):
and i still have Gems which are not in the timetable yet.
Gah. i think i have to study real hard this semester. last sem's result was bullshit. when my results came in the mail, my mum was asking me why its only cukup-cukup makan. thankfully, i passed all. but its such a bad grade. i need to buck up or i can say goodbye to NTU/NUS like now. God please help me, all i want now is to get a good diploma grade so that i can do well for my final year. and to get into NTU, i heard its below gpa 3points probably 2.8 or something.
but i figured its gonna go up! so pleaseeee, help me mates to get through SP successfully!

to those who aims to go to medical school in singapore and you guys are in poly, think twice before you say it. cause they only take in and train 50 doctors a year and where do they get this people? the junior colleges la. and nak harapkan orang melayu nak dapatkan tempat tu?
jangan harap la. a family friend got top in Nus Pharmacy and a malay but still didnt get any scholarship. sad right? okay then. dont talk too much shikin!

GOODNIGHT!

2009-10-07T14:28:00.000+08:00

hello alll.

im still not washed yet. HAH.

im meeting fazlin later cause im a loanshark and i want to get some money from her for the uniform.

my day's so dull this few weeks.

anyways, yesterday was spent well at ayie's crib. i watched the proposal and almost half of drag me to hell.

the proposal cute laa, in the end they really fell in love. cool kape.

and after watching for a lil while, reena came, and then mira.

at first they were okay, wrestling with each other and mocking each other in a funny way,

but im displeased that my day end out pretty screwed up.

thanks to that andro. lembab nak mampus jalan pegi bus stop.

i told her like ages before we even reached tamp one and she walked blardy slow macam siput.

and ayie got into a conflict with mira over the deleted missed calls/received calls.

come on ayie. give that girl a break. i trust her and she loves you alot.

and he got no time for other guys! cant you see that she made her way to ur place even after a tiring day at school.

come on, remember what i told you both months ago?

trust each other la babies.. especially you ayie. you seriously need to change baby or you're going down.

stop saying its over, its only making things worse.

anyhoo, im sorry mira if i didnt talk to u in the bus cause im pretty prepped up myself because of her.

eversince she got this so called partner all she always think about was herself and her perfect lil world.

i always get angry because she put her first and sometimes when i asked for a lil something she wont do it.

please la, im like ur twin for 17 years 7 months and 13 days. even longer cause we're in mum's belly since when when.

i get sad at times but i wont cry for her if she dont even care for my feelings.

and yeah right ur life is so full of fun,laughter,girls,ciggs and booze and "oh-only-god-knows-how-many" friends you have and im the boring dull person i know that.

but you know what, i dont freaking care.

i hope that one day a pretty boy will come down and swoop you off your feet so you will know what you're really missing.

anyways, i dont wanna end this post with an angry and whatever emotions cause im not really angry and shits just saying how i feel cause I KNOW SHE WILL READ THIS.

im not really looking forward to the 9th october jalan raya with the UC.

cause its not like last year. everyone's different the guys i meant and the only reason im going is because of my girls and of course ayie and mira and midah! midah will be my date for that day.

nobody steal OK!

and ayie promised me that im gonna have a blast with him around. yay =)

and you know im not looking forward to see....

have a great day everybody!

2009-10-05T01:44:00.003+08:00

I cant sleep yet. so here's something.

and im so in love with robert pattinson in that movie,

damn him for being so gorgeous in that movie only.

all are invited.
BRING YOU GF/BF IF YOU WANT TO.
PLEASE MAKE THIS HAPPEN((:
and please ensure your house can be visited. haha.
Meeting Point is at Syafiq Masod's House.we'll be having breakfast there, courtesy of his mum, i think(:
ATTIRE IS EITHER BAJU KURUNG OR CASUAL.
REPLY WITH YOUR CHOICE.MAJORITY WINS.

i copy paste this.
(: so yeah, hope to see everyone.

anyhoots, khairul faizal has been complaining to me about his girlfriend whom cheated on him.
and he's going for ns in like two days.
i pity him alot but i dont know what to say to him cause im afraid if what i wanted to say is gonna make him feel worse,
tau tau je la aku straight forward kan.
so yeah, i wish u all the best in ur future endeavours.
and please, dont belittle others la just because they couldn't get into a uni/get a deg or something.
mungkin tak rezeki dorang and they are not as smart as you.
be thankful, and if you're not meant to be with her,
dont worry too much. god has a bigger plan for you.
even though i know, letting go a 5 year memory is quite hard.

and, i played alif fizwan's recording that he said to me in msn 4 months ago.
suddenly made me realise how i suddenly miss this budak busuk.
in his recording he said
" eh pantat, tido lah, eh nak tido lah, pantat tak sek, love you, cibai, bye sayang, cibai sayang "
kurang ajar pnye mangkuk tingkat.
its a good thing we're not close anymore though,
he makes my blood boil almost everytime he speaks.
HAHAHA.
good night world~

GILA PUNYA OLANG.

2009-10-04T13:18:00.002+08:00

apparently what happened between me and him two years ago was not kept a secret between ourselves.

it really shows how much he value our "relation-ship".

i hate it so much when what you share with someone special, he "shared" the story with his friends.

thats very rude and disappointing.

i was waken up by my mum's V loud nagging, sungguh membingitkan.

and then i pulled out of bed and showered.

sorry shady for not being able to join you guys. i'll be so out of place.

imagine going for raya with supposedly 3 of ur ex boyfriends present and another scandal there. *shakes head*

and im shagged so yeah.

i cooked the mee goreng for the guests, not instant! ;)

and they're coming over pretty soon.

ive been keeping my nights occupied by reading twilight over and over again.

i love the book so much.

its more fantastic than the movie, but edward in the movie made my imaginations live in the book.

in one of the books, i know they got married or something and had a baby girl.

wouldnt it be surreal if we really dont have to age forever?

he's having his PSLE this coming week.

and he's reading the book on herbs. and when my mum told him to study,

he said, "dalam buku ni pon ade question and answer pe,science jugak pe"

then he got the stupid slogan by my mum. its not in the syllabus you fuckface.

kau nak tulis recipe dalam answer sheet (shit) kau? pfffft.

he talked back to my mum. asshole. if ur dad's not there i'd spit on you.

k byee all!

2009-10-03T01:54:00.002+08:00

menjeng. dont laugh eh. at me.

part one

part two

final say.
=)

2009-10-02T17:17:00.007+08:00

its been exactly 2 months since i heard you spoke, see you infront of me and smell your very familiar scent.

2 months ago, im v happy when i met you.

the guy who said i had no logic -in his very own nice words.

i miss you v much (:

I wanna thank God for this v special day.

=) believe me, good things will come to those who wait.

so, keep waiting k people.

anyways ive made a new company.

lin wants me to update.

Geng Cacat Sendirian Berhad aka The INs.

Boss -> Kin/me

Secretary/Security -> Lin

Operator/Cleaner -> Rin

kirekan aku boss besar.

i pay them $60 per hour.

baik kannnnn.

midah is in my room now.

im teaching her chem and physics.

it is so irritating as ive forgotten alot of things that used to be in my brain.

tak gune je aku dapat A1 tapi luper skarang takleh ajar memberrrrrrr.

and,

i keep farting today jeezzzzz.

BYE!